The Memoirs

Bruce was a good soul. A kind soul. He loved Dick, he loved Alfred, and he loved his life. Both of them.

But at the moment? He'd have traded them for fifteen minutes of peace.

Why? Because Whitney Houston had been playing, nonstop, for four days straight. And would be, his beautiful, wonderful lover had told him, until the night of Pete's performance.

Bruce had an enormous amount of respect and love for his devoted lover. However? He'd have liked to throttle him and bang him unconscious against the nearest marble pillar.

Though, on his request, the blasted woman and her stringing vocals were playing in the west wing, and were barely audible in his office, thanks be to Christ. "I'm sorry about the noise, Diana."

"Don't be." Stately, regal, flat out gorgeous without knowing a lick of it, Diana Prince tossed her locks of curls over her shoulder, and smiled, warmly, at her dear friend. "How is Mr. Grayson?"

"Annoying. Can I mention that you've never looked lovelier?"

"Compliments won't win you a look at my lasso, Bruce."

"Damn."

Wally West. Fastest man in the East or the West, he liked to call himself, and he was grinning irrepressibly as he leaned against Bruce's study door. "Man, Bruce. Sorry about the timing; got caught up over the state line. Beautiful woman--er, broken down car, sorry. Beautiful woman with car trouble. Had to do a little of the old protect-serve kinda thing." Smirking the whole time. "What's the ruckus, chief?"

Bruce glanced up... then out his office door, where Alfred was still amongst the billowed papers, door hanging open, and sighed. Just… sighed. "Fifteen minutes, Mr. West. I've got things to do." But he rose, and offered his hand. "Not much. Come on in, sit down."

"Wally." Diana looked at him, brow up high, with a particularly distasteful look on her face. Men. All the same.

Dick chose that moment to appear, bearing a Walkman blaring out the same tune that was currently shaking the timbers of the house. "Wally!!!" His kindred spirit. "S'up?" High five.

"Dickster!!!!" Wally gave the high five back, and did a little groove-step to the music in Dick's speakers. "Not much for the sittin', Chief. Got too much on my mind. What's the haps?"

Diana just... rolled her eyes, and sighed. "Could we leave the talking for later, boys? The ambassador of Russia is waiting for me back at headquarters, and it takes me a while to get out of my uniform."

"Yes… ple..." A raised brow. She looked hot in that uniform. Dick was the love of his life, but he'd always have a special place in his cock for Wonder Woman. "Please, guys, take a seat. This is kind of important."

Wally let his eyes slide appreciatively over Diana's outfit. "Y'know, your Highness, in that, you look--"

Dick reached out and kicked his friend in the shin. "Wanna keep your nuts? Don't finish that sentence." He grinned at Bruce, and pulled the earbuds out of his ear. "What's up with the pow-wow, Bruce?"

Diana glared. Darkly. "Sit down, Wally. Act your age. Or half of it, anyway."

Bruce's dimples winked on, because he knew just how much Diana adored the little guy, and he raised his brow. "A lot, actually, Dick. Wally... you just finished your semester from university, right?"

"Yep yep! Sure did!!" Another little groove step. "You are looking at an official... college sophomore. Gonna take a couple weeks, scope out the big fraternities and great colleges, and I'm off to ScholarWorld."

Bruce raised a brow. "How do you feel about being a summer intern for LuthorCorp's PR department?"

"You kiddin' man?" Wally straightened up. "That's like, primo shit, man. You got to kiss some serious old-man ass to get those babies."

Dick choked. Couldn't help it. Just couldn't help it as he imagined Wally West meeting Lionel Luthor for the first time, and loud whoops of laughter escaped him.

Bruce glared, deeply, at his lover, but before he could say a word, Diana cut in.

"We want you to get in and work for Lex Luthor, Walter West. Protect him, from his psychotic alien boyfriend." She glared at him, hoping he'd get the seriousness of his assignment.

Dick just GLARED at Bruce for that, sobering up instantly. "Look, you know, Clark's a little odd sometimes, but he's not going to hurt Lex!"

"Whoa whoa whoa, rewind? You're sayin' that Lex Luthor is dating the Thing from Outer Space and you want me, Walter W. West, to swoop in and save the day?"

Bruce tried his best to ignore his glaring lover, and was hardly able to. "A little odd, Dick?" He answered, softly, and gazed at his boyfriend quietly. "He's going to get Lex killed. Trust me to know my instincts. Lex isn't safe there. I'd feel... so much better if Wally were there, keeping a hold down on things, in case Clark goes postal."

"Look, I kinda got to know Clark while I was there, dammit." Dick glared at Bruce, and dared him to argue. "It's not fair that you're setting a watchdog on him because he freaked out after--" He stopped before he mentioned the birth. "After that thing happened!!"

"Hey, hey, listen to Wally. Wally's got the plan. Wally knows." Look tossed all the way around the room. "Wally's gonna go to Buttfuck Kansas, or wherever this is. Wally's gonna scope out the sitch, and then Wally's gonna report back to Bruce. Kay? Everybody cool with this?"

Diana. Rolled. Her. Eyes. "Because a twenty one year old referring to himself in some pimped out third person is so assuring." She heaved a sigh and climbed to her booted feet, adjusting her lasso on her hip. "If you both need me, John and I are going to be talking to the Russian Ambassador, like I said. Call me if you need me. Have the new number, Bruce?"

He would not stare at her legs. "Yes, I do. Thank you, Diana, for coming."

She nodded, nodded at the other two, glared, and off she went, through the sun roof, taking off out of sight.

Dick's glare didn't let up. "One, why are you staring at Diana's ass like that, and two, where the hell do you get off thinkin' Clark's some kind of freak out to hurt Lex?"

"One, I wasn't staring at her ass, I was admiring it, and two, I've seen Clark with Lex more often than you have, Dick. And I'm telling you, he isn't safe." He turned his eyes to Wally's, so the guilt of what he was doing wouldn't swallow him. "Wally, Clark… is not of this earth. I'm trusting that you wouldn't give that kind of information out, correct?"

"Bruce, who the fuck am I gonna tell? I'm the fastest one on the Geek Squad, okay? Not gonna be throwin' stones here!!"

"You were the fastest one."

"Yeah, right." A snort. "Ain't been the thing on this earth or any other than can beat the Flash."

"Clark Kent." Bruce tipped his head. "He can pick up ten times what a normal can. He can fly. He runs at speeds that can't be measured. He has lasers that shoot from his eyes, ice from his mouth, and he can x-ray through anything on this earth but steel. He also shares a bond with Lex... what they call aushna'. And its changing Lex. I'm terrified for him, and I'm sending you to take care of him."

"And I'm tellin' you Bruce is just fuckin' jealous cause someone else got under Lex's skin," Dick sulked. "Clark'd die before he hurt Lex."

"Ohkay. I sense we're getting into danger territory here. So, uh, if you'll just make sure that I have a job when I get to Buttfuck--"

"Smallville, Wally."

"Whatever. If you make sure the job's there, I'll be there in half an hour."

"I'm not jealous, Dick." Bruce said quietly, evenly. "I'm not jealous. Lex and I are in the past, but he is still someone I care a great deal over. And I won't let him, and his potential, die under the hand of an inexperienced, stupid, ignorant seventeen year old alien with powers he can't even understand the fill scope of. I won't let him go that way." He turned his eyes to Wally. "Lionel Luthor and his husband are away in Ireland for the next eight days. Lex will be the only one working at LuthorCorp today... I have an apartment you can stay at in Metropolis, if you don't mind the commute."

"Commute shummute. Gimmie the keys."

Bruce pushed an envelope across the desk. "Everything is in there. Keys, to an apartment and a car if you want it. There's also fifty thousand dollars, to get some appropriate suits and clothes for working at LuthorCorp. I know for certain they're having interviews today... I've made you a shoo-in, with a personal recommendation from Bruce Wayne."

Wally hummed, "We're in the Money" as he thumbed through the envelope. "Hot shit, Chief. Wally West is on the job. I'm blowin' out of here in five; anything else you wanna add?"

"No." Bruce didn't look at his lover. "Be careful. If you need anything, call."

"You got it. I'll call in and let you know soon as I'm settled in and ready to work, kay? Good. I'm gonna pack my shit up and I'll be in Smallville this evening, cause I'm just takin' a suitcase."

"Alright. Thank you, Wally."

"Cool!" Wally blew out, leaving Dick and Bruce alone in the study.

Dick just glared at his lover. "Not jealous, huh? Right." Dick shoved back from the desk. "ALFIE!!!"

"Dick." Bruce climbed to his feet and grasped his lovers arm, before he could move. "Dick. Baby, come here. I'm not jealous. Please, don't think I am."

Dick shook Bruce's hand off his arm. "Fuck, Bruce... okay, you're not. Fine. But it's not even about that. It's about you being a control freak again, only this time, it ain't me. It's Lex. You don't like Clark, so you're gonna make sure they get broke up and that's just not right, I don't care how much you don't like him. Clark's a great kid, and yeah, he's gone through some rough shit, but that don't make him bad!"

"I have seen what he's doing to Lex. This isn't… about being a control freak, this is about him hurting my best friend. I don't want them to break up, at all, but I want Lex to be safe, so when Clark throws his temper tantrums, Lex is safe. Like, what happened at the queen bar, or when he threatened to kill me. If he can do it to me, he can do it to Lex. And until we no more about Clark and his abilities, I want him safe." He tipped his head, to look at his lover. "If I didn't like him, I wouldn't be making his suits, or getting his stuff together, now would I? Have a little faith in me, Dick."

"You're doing that shit because Lex asked you to, and you don't have the balls to say no to him." Knew it wasn't true, but it had been boiling. "You don't like Clark because Clark stands up to you. I get special privilege because you love me, I get that, and I'm grateful for it, because I'd hate to keep pissin' you off every time I got a backbone. But Christ, Bruce, think a little! Every time Clark's got his back up at you it's because you were fucking with Lex and horning in on his territory!" He sighed. "ALFRED!!!!!"

"There's no need to yell, Master Grayson." Alfred answered, demurely, eyebrow raised at the doorway.

That Dick would think it of him stung, but Bruce, being Bruce, buried it, heavily and deeply. "No amount of your guilt trip is going to change my mind." Was all he answered, quietly. "I'm going to help my friend, and keep him safe, because that's what friends do." He paused, a moment, ignoring Alfred, ignoring the calls waiting for him, his eyes trained on Dick's face. "I don't like Clark because he's a danger to himself and a danger to Lex. I don't care that he stands up to me... I think it gives him character. But it scares me worse, when Lex is involved."

Dick glared, and didn't drop his eyes. "Make sure that my old room's got fresh sheets, okay, Al? I think I'm going to be needing it."

Christ. That stung, worst of all, that he'd be sleeping alone again.

Damned if he was going to back down.

"You know, Dick... once, just once, I wish you'd take my side. I wish you'd see it from my point of view."

"I can't get my head that far up your ass, Bruce." Didn't want to be sleeping alone, but he just COULDN'T back Bruce on this. "Look... if I thought, for a second, that Clark would do anything to hurt Lex, you know I would. You know it as well as you're standing there. How about giving me a little credit here too, huh?"

The insult hurt, and he hated that they were going back to the way they were, before. Hated that more than words could express. "I can't, Dick. I can't take the chance, not when Lex is involved."

Deep sigh, and Dick leaned across the desk, grabbed Bruce by the shirt collar, and kissed him. Hard. "If I didn't love you as much as I do..." Another sigh. "Lex isn't defenseless. Hate to break that to you."

The kiss had been unexpected. And with the way he felt at the moment, unsure if it was welcome. But he kissed back, because he could never say no to a kiss from his lover, and closed his eyes for a moment. "Yes, he is. In more ways than you'd ever think. I can't stop caring about him, Dick, and I can't stop worrying about him. This... is for my peace of mind. Because though I'm not fast enough to get to him in time if he needs it, The Flash is."

"I just hope your peace of mind don't end up messin' up the good thing Lex has got going." Another sigh, and another kiss. "Alfred... cancel the clean sheets, okay?"

"Yes, sir." Demure roll of his eyes, and off Alfred went.

"Even if he hates me, I'll know he's safe. That means more to me than our friendship." Bruce answered, quietly, as he kissed back, a little more into it now, softly, as he gently stroked his lovers face.

Dick just rested his forehead against Bruce. "One of these days, baby... you're gonna learn that EVERYBODY isn't your responsibility. Either that, or drop dead of a heart attack tryin' to carry the world on your shoulders."

"So... you aren't angry?" He asked softly, gently stroking lightly over Dick's hair.

"Not enough to keep me away from you, no. Let's just say... I got reservations 'bout this."

"I know. But its my choice to make, Dick. I want him safe, because I don't trust Clark for as far as I can throw. Not yet. He hasn't gotten everything he's capable of under reign yet." He closed his eyes. Christ, he was fucking depressed. "I think I'm going to go lay down for a while. Alright?"

Dick eyed his lover critically. "Yeah. Gimmie a few minutes to heat up the oil and I'll be there."

"Oil?" he raised a brow, as he patched the calls waiting for him to his voice mail, and shut his computer down.

"Yeah, because you look tense enough to break. Go upstairs, take off... well, everything you want to, and lay face down on the bed. I'm gonna heat up the almond oil, and see if those massages you gave me while my leg was broken rubbed off."

"You don't have to do that, Dick." He wasn't sure if he wanted anyone touching him. He'd just been called on his stalker-like tendencies, and he didn't like that. Couldn't help the way he felt, the need he had to protect the people he loved at whatever cost... even their relationships with him. "Seriously. I just have a little headache."

Dick cooled slightly. "Whatever, man. Just tryin' to make you feel better." Shrug. "Won't do it if it's a big thing."

Sometimes, in moments like these, Bruce wished he could relate better to the person he loved so much. "Don't be angry. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I know you are." Dick picked up his jacket from the chair. "I'm going to take the Ducati out; I think something's grinding in the gears, and I need to get her out on the road so I can hear it before I take the engine casing off. Be back in... fifteen minutes or so, and then I'll be in the garage."

There was once a time when Bruce would have let his own stubborn pride get in the way. But now, there was too much to lose in his life. Too much. Something he'd lost for many months, months that had nearly killed him. "Don't go. Stay. If you can, anyway. If you need to go, that's fine. I'm just going… to take some Motrin and lay down." He wouldn't let pride get in the way, no. But he was Bruce Wayne. And he would not beg, for anyone.

"Dammit, Bruce! Make up your mind! Either you want me around right now, or you don't! Either you want a back rub, or you want to be left alone! I'll give you whichever you want, but you have got to make up your mind and tell me!" Minor huff. "I'm not leaving you again," he said softly. "Ever. Yeah, I'll take the bike out for ten minutes on the highway at some point in the next few days, but I'm comin' right back to you."

He in no way could deal with this right now. "I don't know what I want. I just don't want you to..." Leave me here alone, like last time, when you said you were going out and never came back. When you hated me enough to run off to the ass end of nowhere and be with someone else, rather than be with me. When you couldn't stand me, even when I came looking for you. When you cheated on me and took from your ex-lover's body, rather than take from mine. When you destroyed every scrap of self esteem I have in my body, by taking another lover rather than working it out with me. "To feel like you're second best. Lex is my friend, but you're my everything." Yeah. Alright. His bottle of closely kept insecurities was locked in his gut, tight as steel, even as he felt the pain of the lock burn his insides. "I'm just not in a great mood." Underestimation of the year.

"This is one of those times where I'd smack the hell out of you if I thought it would do any good." Dick dropped his jacket on the chair, and came around the desk. "Once more, with feeling. I, Dick Grayson, took you, Bruce Wayne, forever." He held up his hand, ring glinting in the light, and his finger waggled. "At the risk of making a bad pun... ringing a bell?" He straddled Bruce's lap, so he could get face to face with his lover. "You, Bruce Wayne, took me, Dick Grayson, forever. Again, you were there, right?" Little smile. "This means I'm not the insecure asshole of a brat I was, okay? This means I did a little growing up, and growing into my part in your life. Yeah, I've still got some growing to do before it fits, but... I think we're doing good, don't you?"

"Yes." Softly. Didn't want to talk. He wanted to sleep, and forget this guilt existed inside of him. "Yes, I was there." He carefully, softly, kissed the ring, lover in his lap and close. "I'm glad you feel like you're growing." Didn't say much of anything else. "I just need to lay down. Will you get Alfred to get me some aspirin?"

Dick carefully ran his fingers through Bruce's hair. "Instead of aspirin? Why don't you tell me what's really bothering you? Cause it's more than me being pissy over this." Soothing, calming pets. "You can talk to me."

"No." Quietly. "I can't."

"Yes, you can," Dick said, just as firmly. "You can talk to me, just like I can talk to you. We learned this, right?"

Bruce looked up, then. "We did. I think I was there when we did."

"Good!" Dick's little smile widened slightly. "Now. Let's go upstairs... get you comfortable in bed... and talk about it."

He didn't bother saying Dick wouldn't want to be in bed with him after he did, but he had no intention of speaking, anyway. "I need that aspirin. Have Alfred bring it up, alright?"

"I'll bring the damn aspirin."

"Alright." He helped his lover up, then carefully walked around him, and up the stairs without another word.

Their bedroom was neat as a pin, with only that fucking Whitney Houston playing, and Bruce took it off before undressing. Down to nothing, because it was indescribably hot in Gotham and the old house took forever to cool down with the AC, though it had been running day and night. It would take a week, and until then he'd suffer through the heat. Not that he minded, as he carefully climbed into their cool bed. Sleep a while, then go out to dinner. That sounded...very good. Very good, indeed.

Don't think about things, Bruce. Just shut up and go to sleep.

"Hey, Alfred?" Dick called out. "Y'wanna help me hide a body?" He sighed. "Where d'we keep the aspirin in this mausoleum?"

Alfred poked his head out of the kitchen, rose a brow, and disappeared again for a half a moment, before opening the door once more. A silver serving tray, with two aspirin and a tall glass of lemon iced tea. "There you are, sir. Would you like me to take it up?"

"Nah, I think I can manage without straining myself." A snort. "Still didn't answer about buryin' the body."

"If its Master Bruce's body we'll be hiding, we can stick him with his dead wives." Alfred deadpanned, before sliding back into the kitchen.

"That's my Alfie." Dick carried the tray up the stairs, hip bumping the bedroom door open, and plunked the tray on the bedside table. "Okay. Aspirin, as you requested, and, Alfred's special lemon tea."

"Thank you." Quietly spoken, as he got up on one elbow under the blankets and slid the aspirin down his throat with a swallow of iced tea. Once he was sure it was down he lay back on the pillows, and closed his eyes, to get the tension and strain from his body.

Dick made sure the sheet was pulled up over Bruce's ass before tossing his shirt to the side, and then shucking out of his jeans to climb up and straddle his lover's hips. "Okay. You talk, I'll rub."

Bruce didn't know how to explain that he didn't want to feel sexy in this very moment, but his lover was destined to do what he wanted, so he just closed his eyes and let it happen. Didn't want to hurt his precious lover by telling him he wasn't feeling sexy at all. "You rub, I sleep."

"No no no. Don't work that way." A sigh. "I get you're not in the hot and horny mood, man. Oddly enough, I can read the big neon sign that's flashin' over your head. However, that don't mean you're not gettin' a back rub. So. Be like the Exxon Valdese, my friend, and spill."

Of course. Dick was his lover, therefore he knew him and how he felt without having to say anything. Fuck. "I don't want to risk what I have with you. Not again. Never again." He answered, softly, eyes closed as his lover began to rub his tensed shoulders.

"Mmm. So you'd rather... what? Let an ulcer eat your stomach away and then drop dead in five years because you don't have a spare lying around?" Dick's hands started to knead right in the middle, right below his neck.

A quiet grunt. Christ, for all Dick cold do, he could really rub backs. "Yes."

Dick pressed down harder on the tight, hard knot. "Jesus Christ, Bruce. You got a knot here the size of Gordon's head." More pressure and gentle kneading. "I'm not going to let you be the strong silent type anymore. I can keep talkin' until you do, or you shoot me to shut me up one."

He was quiet, for a long, long time. Nothing but the sounds of Dick's fingers working over his skin, his muscles which he realized ached, and when he spoke, when Bruce finally spoke, his voice was soft and very, very quiet. "Was it because I didn't give you enough love? When you left... was it because I didn't love you enough?"

Dick didn't stop his gentle massage. "No. You did. You loved me... hell, you still do love me a lot more than I deserve. I left... I left because I was feeling shut out. You were trying to protect me, and I felt like you were trying to control me." He leaned over and kissed the back of Bruce's head. "It wasn't you. I wanted it to be, but... it really wasn't. It was me, the way I saw you."

"If… if it wasn't because of that… why did you take Pete as your lover? Why did you betray me, like that? Why... why did you take him, knowing I still loved you, and knowing you still loved me? If I hadn't gone out and found you, would you still be away?"

Dick was quiet for a minute as he moved his hands over, to Bruce's left shoulder. "I took him because I was trying to forget you," he reminded softly. "I didn't want to remember how much I loved you. I couldn't forget, but I tried. When you came into the coffee shop? Knife in the gut." His voice was kind of raspy. "I used Pete, to try and forget you, and it wasn't fair to him or you." Another moment of silence. "No. I wouldn't be away. It was only a matter of time before Lex realized who I was, and I'd have ended up back where I belong--with you--later rather than sooner."

His jaw clenched, as he fought for a deep breath, silent and heavy. "I think I can relate to the knife in the gut." A moment, as he let his eyes finally close. "Would you have come back on your own accord?"

"Yeah. Don't know when. Probably when I stopped being a fuckhead and thought for more than two seconds about what I was doing to you. I'm not always... okay, yes, I am always an asshole, but... not to you."

That's what he'd needed to know, and he quieted down, eyes closed again. "I'm sorry. All I could possibly say... I'm sorry. I didn't know what I had when I had you, until I lost you. Its my fault, Dick. Its my fault that you left. I want to hate you… all I can do is hate myself, for making it so bad that you had to leave me."

"Hey, now!" Dick shoved at Bruce's shoulder until he half turned. "You can't hate yourself! It's not your fault. Hate me, go ahead. I deserve it for flakin' off like that, but Bruce... hell no. You didn't."

Whatever. He was too depressed to think. He just lay back down on his belly, quietly. "I could never hate you."

"Bruce... stop it. Right now, okay?" Slap to his shoulder before he went back to kneading it. "I was an idiot. But I'm back now. I'm not going anywhere. Hell, I can't even stay mad at you for long! My resolve to sleep alone? Lasted all of thirty seconds!! Hey... look at me!" Dick pulled him back over. "This is long haul, Bruce. We're talking the serious forever type."

"How can it be forever, Dick? How can we be together? How can you be with me, knowing any minute I could revert back to my old ways... how can you even think to be with me, when you can't trust me?" He just...shook his head. "I'm in a bad mood. I don't want to talk anymore. I'm going to go to sleep."

"No, you're not. You're not going to sleep on me." He rolled Bruce onto his back, and stayed sitting on his belly. "If I didn't trust you? I'd be hitching a ride to Smallville with Wally right now. If I didn't trust you? I'd be on the phone to Clark warning him. But have I? No. Am I going to? No. Because I trust you. Don't agree with it, but I trust you. Christ, man, have faith in me, have faith in yourself!" Thump to his chest. "It is forever, dammit, because I ain't letting go."

"You already let go. Every fear I had in my life centered down on the fact that you had left me, and there was nothing left to live for, but finding you and begging you to take me back. It was a pride swallowing, heart breaking thing I had to do. And you don't understand. You threw our relationship, four years worth, without talking to me, without explaining to me why you wanted to leave me. You didn't talk to me, and you left to take another lover, Dick. I love you, I love you so much, but you don't understand what that did to me."

"No, I don't," Dick said quietly. "I don't understand. Don't know that I can, because I don't know how your head works sometimes. And I can't apologize enough, either. I keep tellin' you I'm not leavin' again, and I know you got no reason to trust me. But I believe it, Bruce. One day, you are. You are gonna trust it. And you're gonna trust me enough to tell me how that made you feel. Till you do... only thing I can do is make sure you know... I love you, in all my fucked-up Dick-ness, and I won't make the same mistake again."

"It wasn't your mistake." Bruce said, softly, without looking at him, head turned on the pillow. "It was my mistake. For making you feel unwelcome, for making you feel like you weren't a part of my life. That was my mistake, and I drove you away." Now, now, he looked up. "I drove you away from me. I fucked up so bad that you left me for someone else. You'll never know what it is to carry that, Dick." He didn't want to talk, god, dammit. "I want to sleep."

Dick laced his fingers through Bruce's hair and held his head still. "You. Didn't. Okay? You didn't. Believe me, Bruce. If you don't believe anything else. Believe that. You made me feel as welcome as you could. I get that now. I didn't get it then. I was a stupid kid. Leaving you, all that crap in Smallville? I learned just how much you do love me. The stupid kid realized just how stupid he was. And he's growing up to be a man, so he can be with you."

"Its my fault, baby." He whispered, softly. "its my fault. I'm destined to be alone."

"Bull. Shit. Bullshit." He shook his lover. "It's NOT your fault!" Another shake. "You're not going to be alone. I am GOING to be here. No matter WHAT!"

He shook his head, softly. Yeah. Majorly depressed. He shouldn't be saying anything, because he was just depressed, but.. "You said that. But you left anyway. You said no matter what then, too. But you left me, anyway."

Dick let go of Bruce and crawled off his chest to curl up beside him, head on Bruce's shoulder. "It won't happen this time, baby. I promise." He squeezed Bruce tightly. "I'm not that stupid kid. Can't you see that? I've grown so much because of you. Please... tell me you see that."

"I do." He answered, softly, and turned his head towards him as he curled up against him. "I see that. But all I have to do is fuck up again, and you'll be gone again. I can't live like that. I can't live like that, Dick." But he closed his eyes, because he refused to lose his cool.

"No. Bruce... look at me. Please." Dick's eyes were shimmering. "You made a decision I didn't like today. But I'm here, aren't I?"

"You were going to leave again. Sleep somewhere else." Bruce answered, softly. "I'm sorry for this. I don't mean to come off as some needy bitch."

"Yeah, I was. And you know why I didn't? Not because I felt sorry for you. Hell no. I couldn't handle not being in the same bed with you."

Bruce's heart heaved once, as he looked for Dick's hand. "I don't want to be without you, either. Not anymore. I'm sick of being alone."

Dick found Bruce's hand quickly, and laced their fingers together, squeezing with all of Robin's strength. "You're not gonna be alone, Bruce. Batman's got Robin, and Bruce has Dick. And it's always gonna be that way."

"Okay." A pause. "Can I go to sleep now?"

A low chuckle. "Will you let me stay?"

"Of course."

"Then yeah. You can sleep. I'll finish the back rub when you wake up." He settled down beside his lover, and pulled Bruce over so that his head rested on Dick's shoulder this time. "There. Looks like you needed that." Dick's arms went tightly around Bruce's waist, and squeezed.

They... never laid like this. ...Ever. Bruce opened his eyes, surprised, when his body fit perfectly against Dick's, arm going across his lovers belly comfortably, and didn't need anymore than that. He just closed his eyes, and settled into sleep.

- = - = - = -

Lex's wallet didn't feel the least bit lighter, despite the fact he'd give Shayla and Chloe a credit card each, and Whitney a stack of hundred dollar bills pulled out of his wallet. Had given them the keys to whatever car they wanted, provided Whitney drove it, and had spent the better part of the morning wrapped up around Clark.

Then, around noon, he'd gotten up. Gotten dressed, dragged his lover with him, and out to the garage. "We're going shopping," Lex had said, and Clark had given him a look like he was insane. But he hadn't argued, Lex thought, perhaps feeling the same need Lex himself did to get the fuck OUT of the castle and into the world. They'd piled into the silver Murcielago, and by one thirty, they'd been in Metropolis.

Of course Lex had broken every speed limit known to man, but that wasn't news at all. Instead, Lex was pulling Clark behind him, every step of the way, into Heroes Aren't Hard to Find. "The name is slightly ironic, yes, but you'll love it when we get inside."

The jingling bell over the door tinkled, and Lex breathed in the air of his favorite store. "Clark... you are about to see a part of me only one man has ever before seen. You... are about to meet... Geek Lex."

It was on the tip of Clarks tongue to say he'd already met Geek Lex, but he refrained. Barely. He just smiled, gently, and nodded, as he looked around the huge store. It was packed with people, though it was a Friday afternoon, and even his geek antennae began to twitch. There were thousands of anime, video games, books and guides, computer games, software, action figures from Final Fantasy and Zelda, and what looked like Lord of the Rings.

And there were comics.

Lots. And lots. Of comics.

Clark blinked and stared out over all of the shelves, blinking twice... three times, and feeling decidedly peculiar in his flip flops and jeans. Everyone else... heavy combat boots and piercings through every known body part and some unknown, and he shifted, a little, holding his lovers hand a little tighter for a moment. "Whoa."

Lex squeezed. "Don't worry. They'll clear out in about... oh, ten minutes. There's a coffeehouse down the street that does Fantasy Hour in the bookstore it's attached to, and they're just hanging out here until they can overrun the store." He rocked up on his heels, and then waved at the man behind the counter. "Come on." He started shouldering his way through people, until he was standing at the glass display where the register was. "Ferg, tell me you've got the Sean Devlin Series 3 restocked?"

Ferguson MacNair had been running Heroes Aren't Hard To Find for the last fifteen years, and if there's one thing he knew, it's that Lex Luthor bought Warrior Angel like most people breathed. "Got it right here for ya, Lex. Had to have it shipped in from Minneapolis, and this is--"

"Yeah, I know, one of the only five still in existence. Let me see it."

Clark blinked. Just...blinked. He was incredibly amused, whatever parts of him could be, and he let go of Lex so his lover could have both hands to gawk and drool over. The store...was really, really impressive, and he stared at all the titles on the shelves with interest. X-Men, X-Factor, Avengers, X-Man.... and amusingly enough, amusingly enough, Batman.

Hee.

Clark let go and moved over to the title, picking it up to peer at the cover. Yep. That was Batman alright, battling it out with some star galactica nutjob. Weird. He set it down the next moment and kept walking, looking at the tittles curiously.

Lex was holding the box open like he was gazing at a holy relic. "Mmm. Perfect. This... is perfect. This is the mate to the Devilicus Revolutionary... Do I even want to know who you killed to get a mint condition S3?"

"No, man, you don't. But it is gonna cost you."

"That's fine, I don't care. I've got the Devilicus, I have the Pax Galactica, I even have the Warrior Angel and the matching Terence Stamp. I've got it all."

Ferguson snorted. "Not this you don't," he said, pulling out another box. "It's a new release. Industry-only, certificate of authenticity included."

Clark was thumbing over the covers of the X-men comics idly. They looked really cool, but he wasn't as interested in other super heroes, being super heroic himself. Cause he was for sure never going to be able to flip around and to cartwheels and impossible moves like running around the earth a billion times. So he passed the comic books for the video games, and mmmed softly in dorkwad pleasure at the array of video games. He had most of them burned illegally off the web, but ooooo, the new Zelda game was the one he hadn't been able to get. Too much money, but he could gawk at it for a minute before moving on.

Lex's eyes grew wide. "You're kidding. You got the alternative-universe pair?"

"Fully functional, complete with anatomic correctness and a brochure on safe sex."

"I want it."

"These two things together'll kick you into five digits, Lex."

"Don't care. I've got six to spend."

Ferguson jerked his chin at Clark. "Might wanna see what's got your friend so entranced, then. I'll lock these up in the safe until you're ready to leave."

Clark pulled another video game down from the black shelves holding them up, and peered at the back. A new game, Hells Fury Four, though he'd played the first two, and hadn't liked them. This one looked like it had promise, but promise didn't mean squat for a good game. So he set it down and moved on, gazing fondly over the old NES Mario Brothers games and came up on X-Box stuff. That new Matrix game, though he'd played it and hated it, and he sighed, softly, looking over what there was to be had.

Lex nodded and moved over to the rack, and put his chin on Clark's shoulder. "What's got your attention? Oooh... Devil May Cry 2. Dante. Okay. We're getting that." He pulled the cartridge box off the shelf." He followed the longing gaze back towards The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker and added it to the Devil May Cry cartridge. "Help me check and see if they've got the new Speed Racer Deluxe."

"Lex… we can't afford that." Clark answered, turning his head to grin down at his lover, before up again. "Leave them. We can rent 'em, see if they're any good. What's Speed Racer?" He asked, eyebrow raised as he stopped and blinked. An old Sega was on sale for twenty nine bucks, and Clark just... "We gotta get that for Eleanor. We have to. And the Pocahontas game. And the Lion King game. She'll love it."

Lex just blinked at his lover before rapping his knuckles on the side of Clark's head. "Hello, Clark? Hi, I'm Lex Luthor. Maybe you've heard of me? More money than sense?"

A soft, shy smile. "I know. But they're just games and stuff, Lex. You should save your money for important stuff, you know?" Though he leaned down and picked up the small Sega box, and added the fifteen dollar Pocahontas and Lion King games on top of it. "Got to. She's the princess."

"Clark, I'm spending thirty thousand dollars for three collectible action figures. I think I can pop $59.95 for The Legend of Zelda!"

He blinked, turned… blinked again... stared. "What? You're...what?"

"I'm buying the Warrior Angel/Devilicus Alternative Universe figures, which are about eleven five each. Then I'm getting Sean Devlin S3, which is the only series three figure I don't have, and he's at least five and a quarter, and that's base book value."

Blink. Twice. "You weren't joking about the whole geek Lex, thing, huh?" But he smiled, and pressed a kiss to his cheekbone before shifting the box onto his hip. "Anything else we're looking for?"

"No, I wasn't joking. I'm nearly obsessive, in fact." A sneaky look. "Tonight? I'll show you my room. It's where I hide everything about my obsessions. It's the locked door at the end of the south hallway." He gave a little shout as he saw the Speed Racer game, and put it on top of the other three games. "Clark... put the Sega back. We'll pick up a new console on our way to Rico's."

"Nooo. Sega. This was my first video game console, where Little Clark learned he could fight bad guys with remote controls. I went through about eighteen controls, but damn I had fun. And Ellie's gonna have the same fun. Plus, you know, Pocahontas. Who can say no to her?"

Lex didn't bother arguing. "Give it all to Ferg, and he'll hold it for us while we finish looking. Don't tell Bruce, but I've got a wall of Batman crap in my little room." He kept his voice pitched low, so no one else would hear.

Clark just... rolled his eyes, but grinned, and walked through the crowd. Lex, being a tad shorter, had had an easier time of it than Clark, but he finally excuse me'd his way to the front desk, and sat the console in its box and the little games up onto the counter. "Lex... asked me to give this to you, to hold for us?"

"Yeah, I got it." Ferguson stowed it under the counter. "Haven't seen you in here, before. Name's Ferguson MacNair."

Slowly the store had started to empty out, and now, Clark and Lex were the only two patrons in the store.

"Hi, Clark Kent." He offered his hand. "Lex comes in often?"

"Hello, Clark Kent." Ferg shook the offered hand firmly. "Yeah, he pops in about every other week, and picks me over."

"He's been holding out on me." Clark answered in amusement, as he motioned towards their things. "We'll only be a little while longer. Thanks for keeping this stuff up here for us."

"Take yer time, not like I got anything else goin' on."

"Clark!" Lex yelled, from the other side of the store. "Come see this!!"

Sigh. "Dweeby boyfriends beckon." he turned and carefully moved through the now mostly empty store... then realized it was totally empty, and moved easily to find his lover. He stepped through the action figure aisle, and saw his lover... and just barely, barely kept himself from laughing. His lover was all but hopping foot to foot and Clark smiled as he rejoined him. "I'm here, baby."

"Look! Look!!!" Lex was staring at the brand new poly-resin Batman and Robin figurines. "C'mon. You think Bruce would like?"

"Oh, come on. Batman is in no way this muscular. Christ its gonna get to his head." Yeah, but Clark was grinning, as he took one and peered at it. "How much?"

"$109.98"

Choke, cough, gag. "They're not THAT nice!"

"Sure they are. Grab it, don't drop it. Come on, I've already got the Devilicus there."

Clark just... sighed, deeply, and gave his lover both figures, rolling his eyes. "Rich boy." Said, of course, with a kiss on the cheek... then another, less chaste kiss, on the neck. Yeah. So maybe Geek Lex, like Scientist Lex, turned Clark on. Big time. Not that he'd ever admit it.

Lex muttered softly as Clark's mouth moved over his neck, and he shifted so that his leg slid in between Clark's, rubbing lightly as he nibbled on Clark's ear.

"We're in a store. With the manager watching us." Clark murmured, softly, in amusement, as he licked his way up to the soft, warm spot behind his lovers ear. So much for not telling. "I love it when you get all dorky. You're so fucking sexy."

"I don't care." Lex kept nibbling on Clark's ear as it bobbled in front of him, and as Clark moved up, Lex's mouth moved down to suck on his lover's throat. "We'll go. Get a room. We can fuck."

JINGLE! The bell over the door rang again, and Wally sauntered in. "Boys, and girls, and Hero-lovers alike, Wally West is a Working Stiff!! Gainfully employed for the summer at LuthorCorp, and I want to reward myself. Tell me, good proprietor, what have you today?"

Clark's fingertips had just slipped down, teasingly, over his lovers crotch, when the bell over the door jingled and her jerked away. He lifted up from his lover, where he'd been pressed close, and tugged his t-shirt down a little bit over the slight lump that was in the works for a true flaming erection. But… he stopped himself before it could start, and swallowed.

At the mention of LuthorCorp, Lex jerked his head up, and glared. "Who are you, and how did you get a job at LuthorCorp?" Because this obviously was not LuthorCorp material, and he was going to have fun firing whomever hired this ass.

Wally whistled. "Whoa, hold it there." He turned around, and raised an eyebrow. "Mr. Luthor himself, in the bald flesh!! Wally West, at your service, and I'll tell you, Mr. Wayne couldn't stop saying enough about you!"

Lex was slightly mollified. "You worked for Bruce Wayne?"

If Wally had been wearing suspenders, he'd have been sliding his thumbs under them. Instead, he just stuck his chest out. "Got a shiny letter of recommendation, sittin' on your desk, Mr. L."

Clark watched the exchange silently. The guy...Wally West, he was cute. Not sexy, like Lex, but he was handsome in his own right, though Clark knew better than to say that out loud. So he just watched, quietly, squeezing his lovers hand and half unsure if he should be doing it. Because this guy... wrong vibes. Or, well, the vibes were coming off Lex, an Clark was associating them with the guy.

Little alarm bells were ringing in Lex's head. "How well do you know Bruce, Mr.... West, is it?"

"Sure is, and Bruce and I go waaaaaaay back," Wally said confidently.

"So then you know the name of Bruce's butler... Albert, is it?"

"Nope, Alfred. Bad memory there, Lex. Sure your brain's not catching cold?"

Clark watched, silently, quietly, trying not to stare and be rude. "I'll… leave you guys alone, Lex, okay?"

Lex's hand tightened on Clark's. "No, it's all right. Mr. West, I want to see you in my office, first thing Monday morning. Clark... let's go. We still need to have lunch and hit Rico's, and then I'm calling Bruce tonight."

"Okay." Clark swallowed, and looked up at the young man. "Nice to meet you, Mr. West."

"Nice to meet you too." Wally didn't call Clark by his name, though he made a point of memorizing the boy's appearance, just in case. Way to make a first impression, Flash, he thought sourly to himself. But, at least I got an in with the boss!!

"I'll reserve that judgment for later," Lex said softly. "I'll see you Monday morning, Mr. West."

Clark waved a little, winced on behalf of his lover, and walked with him, with the figurines in hand, towards the front of the store. What's wrong, Lex? Why are you so on guard? Do you know him?

I don't know, Lex answered back, stroking over Clark's forearm as they spoke silently. He's got his own guard up, but he says he knows Bruce and... I'm just not sure I like this.

"Its alright." He whispered, softly. "You'll see him on Monday. Come on, Lex... let's pay for this stuff, then go get a room somewhere." I want, aushna'. I want you. Please, please, oh please tell me you brought lube. Not that I care, because there are many substitutions, but I don't want to hurt you, beloved. Cocky assurance he'd get to be inside his lover, fuck him hard, and he shivered, heavily, with pleasure.

You think I travel without it any more? Go look in the glove compartment. A little snicker. "Go ahead, go on out to the car and get it cranked; I'll pay for my stuff and be out in a minute."

"Okay." Clark answered, softly, though he smiled and gently nuzzled his lovers throat before slipping away. His flip flops flopped softly on the tile floor of the store as he stepped out, the bell ringing as he slipped out onto the sidewalk.

Lex turned back to the counter. "Okay. What's my damage?"

Ferg pulled everything out and rang it up. "Oooh. Your Visa's going to love this, Lex. $53,500."

Clark nearly went into convulsions on the sidewalk as he peeked in on Lex's head, though he managed to keep himself righted until he slid into the car. Exploded breath, a pant of horror, and he just... just shook his head, as he started the car from the passenger seat and went into the glove compartment for the lube.

Had he mentioned he was horny as hell? He wanted to tug himself out and jack himself off with a handful of that stuff, but knew better. He'd get in trouble, big time, if he spewed on the leather. Plus, if Lex found out he was taking his own pleasure... more trouble. The good kind. Mmm.

Lex handed over the platinum Mastercard and scrawled his signature on the credit slip. He cradled the Warrior Angel figures lovingly, almost like a baby, and gave Ferg the safe address that Bruce had his things shipped to, and smirked at the thought of Bruce opening the box and finding Batman beaming up at him from the packing material.

Clark, if you touch yourself, I promise you, you won't touch me for a week.

Shudder. Please, oh please. Just a little one. My pants don't fit.

No. Lex smiled at Ferguson as he collected his purchases.

Lex, please, please aushna'. Always got his lover with the begging, and his cock was only getting harder every moment his lover told him no, because the deliciousness of him complying was just unbelievable.

I don't care, Lex said cavalierly as he pocketed the credit card and the slip, and finished scrawling a smart-assed note to Bruce. You can wait for us to find a room... or you can wait that week I mentioned earlier.

"Please, please no." Whimpered, softly. He was... well, nineteen, but still. Nine. Teen. He couldn't hold himself together for longer than fifteen minutes, and it had BEEN fifteen minutes. He was half crazed with lust, and he heaved a shivering, aching little sigh of pleasure as he shifted his hips and lay his head back. Without touching himself. "You suck."

Yes, I do. Quite well, so I've been told. Lex smirked again, and laughed throatily at nothing as he gave Ferguson a flip little grin.

Oh, *Christ*. Please, Lex, hurry, please, come on, gotta fuck, please, I can't take this!

Yes, you can take it. You can take it and then some, because Clark? We're going to have lunch, too. "Thanks, Ferg," Lex said audibly, and lifted his bag of precious purchases. They were sealed in little protective cases, and Lex was already thrilled.

Lunch?! LUNCH!? Funny? NOT? His cock gave an answering thrum, a heavy thump. Oh God. He was going to have to sit through lunch. That was the meanest thing he'd ever heard. His ass was squeezing around nothing, his cock was burning, hard as rock against his thigh, and he shifted, grunting softly.

Yes, you're going to have to sit through lunch, Lex answered, blowing past Wally without a backward glance.

Wally gave a low whistle, and sighed. Dug in his pocket for his brand new cell phone, and called Bruce. Got his voicemail--busy doin' the boy, Bruce?--and Wally wasn't stupid enough to leave a detailed message. "Hey, Bruce, it's me. The rec was great. Lovely place, Smallville... by the way, I just happened to meet a couple of friends of yours, and I don't think they like me very much. I'll talk to you later."

Lex opened the passenger door of the Murcielago, and carefully stowed his purchases in a lockbox in the back seat he'd brought along specifically for this purpose, and then grinned at Clark. "What do you feel like, sport?"

He bit his lip, tightly, and tried to calm himself. No way was Lex gonna be the only calm one. His temper, and his pride, spiked up. Fine. If his cock wasn't going to have a tight spot right now, neither was Lex's. Ever again. He glared at him, watching as he stored the stuff, and would have stuffed the lube in his pants pocket if his pants had any room to put stuff in. So instead, he just set it in the cup holder, and crossed his arms. "Wherever you'd like to go."

Lex just leaned over and petted Clark gently. "Patience, my young apprentice. You keep teasing me like this, and I'll take us to the Bistro for a full seven-course meal, which'll take us... about three and a half hours, all told."

Apprentice his ass. Sex? Never again. Fully denying Lex anything to DO with his cock. That was it. He could live his life with his hand and some lotion. He'd done it for the last four years, hadn't he? He could...do it again! He had a vibrator! He'd make do! No. More. Sex. EVER. Again. "Fine." Clark grit his teeth. "Wherever you'd like, Lex."

Lex just shrugged. "In that case, since you're not interested, we'll just head on over to Rico and Aden's. See what they have going on today."

Not. Interested. His cock said otherwise, but he bit the inside of his cheek until his voice was under control. "That's great."

Lex just pet Clark again, put the Murcielago in gear, and pulled out of the parking lot, chanced a glace at his lover, and when nothing came of it, Lex gave a little internal shrug as he sped out onto the highway, and started burning asphalt towards the little boutique where Rico and Aden camped out.

They weren't finding a motel.

They were really going to go find Rico and Aden.

Oh. God.

He barely kept the whimper in, biting the inside of his cheek. Damn his lover. Damn him! Damn him to hell, because he knew Clark had an over reactive libido. Damn him! DAMN HIM! He glared at him out of the corner of his eye and shifted, as much as he could, as he thought of unpleasant things. Trees. paper. Baseball.

Lex flinched at the glare coming from the other side of the sportscar, and he schooled his features carefully before looking concernedly over at Clark. "What?"

"Nothing." Bit off a little sourly, as he shifted again. Crossed his arms. Glared out the window.

"Okay." Lex turned his attention back to the highway, and reached down to flick on the radio, the backs of his fingers rubbing against one hard-muscled, bulging thigh.

Uuuhn.

Uuuuuuuuuhn.

FUCK.

He bit the inside of his lip, though the inhalation couldn't be helped, and he swallowed, hard, without looking. The touch had been electricity right through his brain, tensing his nipples and perking his cock to attention. It twitched, tight in his jeans, and he wouldn't whimper. Would. Not.

At the sucked-in breath, Lex looked over at his lover again, and stroked the back of his hand over Clark's bicep. "Clark, seriously. Are you all right?"

"Fine." Not fine. And his lover knew it.

Of course Lex knew it. He just turned back to the highway, and turned onto Mulhaven Blvd, which is where Rico's salon had been built.

Right across from Palmetta Springs Hotel.

Fuckingfuckingfucking. Sudden images, of when Rico and Aden had come to stay at the house. Of Aden wearing the pantyhose and the dildo under his clothes, and how hot the idea had been. How much Clark had liked it, so much so that he'd hidden away and jacked off with a pair of stockings in secret.

And now. Lex. Teasing him mercilessly.

Fine. Alright? Fine. He would be good. No more begging. Flat. Out. Ignoring. His lover.

Lex stopped at the stoplight, but instead of turning into Rico's salon, Lex turned into the hotel, turned off the ignition, and got out of the car. "We're here."

Clark. Just. Glared.

"What?"

"Don't tease me." Alright. Anger wasn't working. At all. Clark knew it, so instead, he sicced out... the pout. Just... big pout, little sniffle. "I can't take it."

Lex frowned softly. "I'm sorry, Clark." Teasing was gone and over with, and Lex climbed back in the car, crawling over the gearshift to curl up against his lover. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have teased you." His arms wrapped around Clark's waist gently and squeezed. "I was bringing you here all along. It's gay friendly, and everything, and the rooms have Jacuzzis. It was supposed to be a surprise."

Clark won. HAH! Big grin to replace the pout. He always got his way, and he smiled, broadly, down at his lover, before quickly sobering, and throwing in a sniffle for good measure as he leaned down and bit into his lovers earlobe... drawing a single drop of blood, which he licked away, and sucked softly at the lobe. "I always get my way."

Lex shuddered in Clark's lap as his earlobe was bitten and he hugged tighter at the little sniffle. "I'm sorry. Please... I'm sorry." Curled up tighter onto himself as he cuddled Clark, rubbing against him and asking forgiveness.

Clark grinned and leaned down to nose his lovers own nose, carefully, eyebrows wriggling. "I forgave you fifteen minutes ago. Come on, lets go get a good bed." His cock was down enough where it wouldn't show… too much, and he let go of his lover with a soft kiss to climb out of the car.

Lex still didn't relax until he'd heard the words from his lover's throat, and then he sighed happily. He climbed out of the car with Clark, staying pretty much plastered close to him. "Didn't you hear me when I said what kind of place this was? Doesn't matter what you show. They're not going to care." He nibbled at Clark's throat as they walked up the walkway and into the front lobby.

The staff knew who Lex was, from previous visits, and they didn't bother to ask him for anything, just handed a key over the desk to the penthouse suite, best in the hotel, and Lex shoved the key in Clark's front pocket, getting a good grope as he did and using his elbow to press the elevator button.

Yeah, the hotel was gorgeous. What Clark saw of it. His eyes were mostly white fuzz around his face, seeing Lex, feeling his arousal, smelling his lovers, Lex, more Lex, a key... a hand. Which nearly was the end of his control as he let out a yelp, strangled in his throat, and was pushed... into an elevator.

Elevators were good.

Private.

It took him a half a moment to have his lover pressed against the wall, rubbing against him as he kissed him. Heavy, hard, all the righteous indignation going out the fuckin' door. He sucked and kissed his lovers mouth, moving down his throat and neck as he groaned. His pleasure centers all woke up, sending tingles over his body cause yeah, sex, soon. Sex, sex, and he was going to punish his lover big time.

"Lube! LUBE!" He gasped, letting go and staring in horror at his lover. "Forgot... car!"

Lex fisted his hands in Clark's shirt and jerked him back down, arching up, rubbing against him, and thrusting. "They provide it here, Clark, along with condoms, basic toys, dental dams, and a gym."

Oh. Oh, that was good. Except the elevator dinged, and he was very vaguely aware of another couple... a gay couple, waiting for the elevator, as he grasped his lover, hauled him against him, wrapped his legs around his waist, and went stumbling for their room. Cock, cock, Lex, ass, good, want, FUCK!

Lex shoved Clark against the door, hand dipping in Clark's pocket for the key he'd shoved in earlier, pulled it out with a huge grope, then before he unlocked the door, he unzipped Clark's jeans. Lex's hand dipped into his lover's pants, pulled his cock, and then turned around, grinding his ass hard against it as he opened the door to the penthouse and dragged Clark in behind him.

Huge, sprawling room that had one wall made just of glass. Huge, panoramic view of the city that was completely lost on Lex as he got down on his knees, as soon as they were in the room, and swallowed Clark whole.

"Gnuuuh!" Sobbed cry as he leaned back against the door. His cock was almost blue with want, and then his lover, his lover with one final EVIL tease had rubbed just like that against him. But now he was deep, enveloped in hot and warm and good, but nooonnonoono. And also, no. He hissed and grasped his lover under the armpits, dragging him upwards and grasping him tightly. "No. Mine. My rules. Mine. You are mine and I'll do with you as I please. If you don't like it, tough." He pushed back on the thick, warm mattress and lay his lover out on it, on hands and knees, before standing again and undressing. Shirt, jeans, flip flops...gone. "Where? Where is it? Need it now."

Lex let go of Clark's cock with a pop and a little whimper, but he got even harder than before as Clark manhandled him, and he'd swear his lover knew how much it turned him on. Didn't take off his clothes yet because he hadn't been told to and he looked over at the bedside table. "Top drawer beside the bed, also in the bathroom."

Clark disappeared into the bathroom at once, as the information was relayed to him. He found the lube easily... not the kind they used, but it would do. He also got a towel, moistened a small hand towel, and added it to his collection as he stalked back into the bedroom. Now. Now, now, now. No time for games, no time for teasing, no time for anything. He just sank down on the bed behind his lover and, leaving him dressed, he ripped a hole in the seat of his lovers slacks. Just enough where he could fit through, and as soon as he'd finished ripping, he leaned down and slipped his tongue through the hole... and into his lover. He pressed against the little starburst opening with the flat of his tongue until it gave and allowed him in, allowed him deep, and he stroked in as far as he could go as he did it.

Lex jumped slightly when he heard fabric tear, then realized he was still mostly dressed and very glad he'd skipped underwear today. He shuddered as Clark's tongue licked across him and he spread his legs further, opening his cheeks and putting his head down in supplication, offering his ass to his lover with little whimpers and begging cries.

Clark licked, all around the tiny hole, opening it up with wriggling squirms of his tongue, until he couldn't take it anymore. He lifted up and slicked his fingers with shaking hands, rising to grasp his lovers shoulder gently and push him back to meet his slicked fingers. Two fit in easily, sliding in deeply, and he scissored and squirmed, opening him up.

When he was certain he wouldn't wound his lover, he rolled on the condom Dominic had given him before they'd left for their trip. Not a word, just handed one to him one morning without even explaining why. Clark didn't question it, but after reading the label, had saved it just for a moment like this. It fit snuggly around him, and though Clark wasn't good at using condoms, it fit well. Very well.

And with the slick moisture Clark added to it, he pushed into his lover.

Lex was rocking on his knees, whimpering softly, arching his back and trying to wiggle out of his clothes. When it became obvious that Clark wasn't going to let him, Lex fisted his hands in the sheets and dug his nails into the handfuls of cloth, and begged his lover softly to feel Clark's skin against his.

Nearly cried in frustration when Clark's condom-covered cock slid into him, and even as his ass gripped Clark's cock tightly, he whimpered softly at the denial.

"Tell me," He whispered, still sinking into his lover. The ribs of the condom were... unbelievable, and he shuddered as he rolled his hips in, deeper and deeper, pushing into his lover even as his baby begged. "Tell me."

Lex was rendered nearly speechless as Clark sank into him, the ribs along the condom scraping his body with the exquisite slowness of Clark's penetration and it was driving him crazy. He was trying to buck free and push back on Clark's cock in a single motion but he couldn't, because Clark wouldn't let him move, and he was whimpering again. "Please... can't... can't feel you. Wanna feel you. Not fair... can't touch you, please, I'm sorry, please, they hurt." It was true; his skin was so used to rubbing against Clark's, highly sensitive and aroused as they fucked, and the rough, harsh scrape of cotton, silk, and leather was almost painful.

"Very fair." He whispered, softly, into his lovers ear. He rolled his hips out, then in, fully, all the way, and he whispered, quietly, "If you please me... I'll please you." He grasped his lovers waist and rolled over, carefully, and gently turned his lover on his cock so that Lex was facing him in the riding position. His cock felt like it was going to wrench off when he turned him, but the pain was pleasure, and he groaned softly. "For everything you do… something... will come off. Look at you, Lex... deep inside you, and you have... still have your belt on." Moan.

Hard whimper and a little cry as he was turned around, and he folded his knees down under him, so that he was supported in this new position, and he sobbed softly, even as he started to ride. The ribbing rubbed against him teasingly, his ass clenching around Clark's cock with every stroke, and his nails raked down Clark's chest. "P-please, aushna'," Lex moaned quietly, hips rolling and cock aching to burst inside his pants as he loomed over his naked lover.

All of Clarks resolve was gone. But this was the tone he wanted, because he wanted...Lex to get his revenge.

Lex revenge was the best revenge of all.

He slowly, carefully, because he couldn't say no, came up to stroke over his lovers hard cock in his pants. Quick, warm, gentle rubs, hands coming up after they were done to rip his lovers shirt off down the middle. All the buttons popped and flung away, and Clark smiled as he raked his fingernails down his lovers chest. "Like this?"

"Ungh!" Lex screamed it, chest thrusting forward into the scraping nails, hands going immediately to pinch, squeeze and rub the red welts left on his skin by Clark's nails, and he squeezed hard on his lover's cock as his own jerked roughly in his pants. Didn't care about the buttons flying everywhere, didn't care about anything but riding Clark harder, fucking himself deeper with his lover's cock as he scraped over his own nipples, cock aching as he pinched himself hard.

"Good, good, so good, Lex, so good!" More scrapes with his fingernails, and he dragged the shirt off him, as he began to fuck upwards. Hard, jolting thrusts, which yeah, he loved, and whoever said rough fucking couldn't be good apparently hadn't ever had a rough fuck. He ripped his lovers belt to shreds, pants the same, and kicked off his shoes as he rolled his lover over into the pillows and fucked him. Hard. Lex's legs around his waist, his body jolting and moving with each movement, and he grunted and groaned, deeply, as he did. The condom… was unbelievable. His cock was burning with pleasure, the ribs like a billion fingers, and he'd have to thank Dominic later because good Jesus Christ this was good. He fucked, hard and fast, bed jolting under each and every one of his movements, as he kissed his lover deeply.

As soon as his clothes were gone, Lex leaned over, sucking Clark's mouth hard, pulling himself up and dropping down on his cock with utter abandon and ferocity. The barriers were gone now, and he rubbed his body against Clark's skin as much as he could, drinking in the feel of it, his reward, and he licked over it with catlike nibbles as he rode hard, his ass slapping loudly against Clark's pelvis with every bounce.

Clark grunted and pushed, wrapping his arms around Lex's waist and tugged, moved, rolled, so he was laying over his lover. Arms pinned, body pinned, and Clark smiled, like a jungle cat, down at his poor, helpless lover. His reward, for being a good boy and not begging, was a hard, heavy fuck in and out, though no more than that. He could control himself, a little, and he licked his lovers nipples, murmuring against them in pleasure. "Tell me, Lex. What do you want?"

Lex arched up, as much as he could under Clark's weight, rubbing himself against Clark's body, his cock trapped between their bellies as he rubbed, mewling softly as his cock jerked with the feeling of Clark pressing down on him. His legs rose to wrap around Clark's waist and he pushed up, whimpering. "You, please, I want you, I want you, all of you, please, let go, all of you, aushna'."

Clark murmured, very softly, and slowly stroked into his lover. All his muscles were tense, heavy with the want to make love, but he kept himself slow, easy, gently stroking in and out of his lover. "Tell me what you want," He whispered, softly, as he moved against him, mouth sucking on neck, throat, shoulder and ear.

Lex licked at Clark's cheek, his jawbone, his chin, mouth when it came into range. His legs around Clark's waist pulled him up, and he squeezed with legs and ass both. "Hard, Clark, please. Hard, wanna feel it, hurt me with it, please, hard."

"Oh, God." Clark moaned it very, very softly and began to move. Heavy, hard, jolting thrusts against his lover that pressed him against the pillows. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders and upper body and held him close, close as he could, as he fucked him, hard. Long, deep thrusts, hard tugs out before all over again. Pleasure, all through his blood, and he was too young and he wailed his ecstasy as he thrust, fucked the person he loved more than life itself.

Lex grunted in response, raising his body into every thrust, his nails dragging over the rainbow mark on his lover's forearm, feeling the one on his arm throb in answer every time he touched it, loud shouts of ecstasy that drove him to fuck up harder against Clark, squeezing his cock harder with every motion, biting hard on Clark's throat even though he couldn't mark, sucking hard on the bitten skin as they mated harder and faster.

"My lover, my lover, my lover, feel me, feel my pleasure, let me feel yours, lover, I love you, I love you, I love you, mine, mine, MINE!" He cried in an almost victory, as he grasped his lovers cock and squeezed, quickly beginning to jack him off. He leaned half on his side to do it, still moving but getting as tight a handhold as he could get, and jacked his beautiful lover off as he kissed him, deeply. Lex's cock felt like fire inside of him, fire and heat, and he stroked it harder and faster as he moved.

Lex bit down hard on Clark's skin, growling and barking out words in his lover's language. "I love you, my aushna'! Our pleasure, taken together, please!!" His hips bucked roughly as Clark's hand closed around his cock, body shuddering as he fought to come and pushed it down at the same time, wanting to come but never to end.

Clark did it for both of them. He couldn't take it anymore--the condom was like a ribbed fire in his groin, his lover was going insane under him, and he just...erupted. He came so hard he saw stars, thrusting in as deeply as he could and coming into the condom as he wailed and stroked his lovers cock harder, faster... and squeezed it without meaning to when he climaxed. Orgasm rushed into his ears like a river and he wailed, loudly, in agonized pleasure that both shocked and pleasured him indescribably.

The tight, pleasure-pain of the squeeze to his cock was the last thing that Lex could stand. His body jerked as his cock all but exploded, streaks of come shooting out of him so hard they reached his chest, his chin, even his cheeks and mouth. His ass locked around Clark's cock, squeezing and milking the condom-covered shaft as his body twitched.

Came for what seemed like an eternity as he clung to Clark, riding the shallow thrusts of his lover's orgasm, licking his lips and tasting himself on them as he arched up and rubbed along Clark's rippled abs.

Sexiest. Thing. He'd ever. Seen. Clark wailed as his lover came, squeezing and trapping him, and that was just about all the energy he had left. He plunked down onto his lover, panting, gasping for breath, his chest heaving as he shuddered all over and licked every spare place of skin on his lovers shoulder and throat. He was in big trouble. Big. Huge. Trouble. He knew he shouldn't have, but it was just so fun.

Lex was clinging to Clark like a vine, arching his throat for Clark's little licks, shifting gently to give Clark access to more skin as his legs stayed tightly twined around his lover's waist, breathing heavily as he luxuriated under Clark's hot, heavy bulk, squeezing Clark's length still inside him.

"Gnuh." He whispered, softly, into his lovers throat, lips quirked up into a lazy grin. He gently rolled his hips and got up on one elbow, to gaze into his lovers sweating face. He gently, ever so gently, licked a rivulet of sweat from Lex's temple, and grinned, wickedly, down at him. "Get my way."

Lex purred as Clark licked him, and then blinked demurely up at his lover. "I could have just taken you to Rico's instead of surprising you here, you know," he teased softly. "I'm sorry I teased you, though." Gentle strokes.

"I know." He kissed his lover gently. "Sorry I teased, too. ...'kay, not really." He giggled, and carefully slipped out of his lover, moaning heavily the entire time. He'd come so hard... oh, my God, and he blushed crimson as he finally slid out of his lovers body. He quickly, effectively, rolled the condom off, tied it best as he could when there was a hole at the tip, and pushed it off the bed onto the tatters of his lovers clothes.

Lex sat up too, his ass aching wonderfully pleasured as he rolled onto his side and wrapped around his lover, chin on Clark's thigh. "Mmm. You realize, of course, those were my clothes?"

"Hmm?" Embarrassed squeak, before he realized his lover hadn't seen the poor condom. So instead he smiled, kissed him, and muttered, "You can never know where that condom came from."

Lex made a face. "It came from my father, didn't it?"

Clark grinned, and leaned down to lick his lovers forehead... then his lips, and kissed him softly. "Dominic. No idea why. He just gave it to me over breakfast one morning, without even looking at me. Did you like it?"

"Dom. Mmm. Slightly less sickening." A grin as he returned the kiss softly, and he nibbled at his lover's full lower lip. "I did like it. Very much so."

"Cool." he smiled, gently, and ever so sneakily leaned down to take an X-rayed peak into his lovers tummy, to make sure no pieces of condom got blown out inside of him. Once he was sure no tell-tale latex was hiding inside of him he leaned down to gently kiss the concave belly, and grinned. "It cracked me up. He was reading his newspaper, and just pushed it over the table."

Lex giggled when the lips skated over his belly, and then flushed lightly when it rumbled. "Um... sorry about that."

Clark smiled, softly, and kissed again, gently. Alright. Guilt. So maybe Lex wasn't going to enact revenge. Crap. "I'm sorry… for being teasing, and ripping your pants."

Lex shook his head softly, and kissed his lover, cuddling him close. "It's okay; don't be sorry. I was the one teasing you; I was being horrible. I didn't think--I'm sorry." He curled up beside his lover, stroking over Clark's chest lightly.

He felt BAD. Crap! And worse, and BAD! "But… I teased you. And made you cry." he winced softly and rubbed his thumb over his lovers eyelid. "I love you. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be a mean tease person. I should have made love to you."

Lex moved up and kissed Clark's thumb, suckling it gently a moment before letting it go. "You didn't make me cry, Clark, it's okay." A kiss to Clark's palm. "You didn't. Trust me, okay? Please... don't feel bad." Christ. He was fucking up left and right, and he just curled up tighter beside his aushna'. "You had the right."

"You're not fucking up left and right." Sometimes their link had a sneaky way of being useful. "I just... did it cause... I thought you'd punish me. The… good kind of punishing."

Clark was not at all trying to look hopeful. Nope.

Lex looked startled for a minute before settling back down. "You didn't do anything that I'd punish you for." But then he gave a little grin. "But if that's all you wanted... all you had to do was tell me. I could have taken care of that before we left home this morning."

UUUUuhn. "I always forget that pesky asking thing." He murmured, and shuddered at the thought. Little Clark, limp against his thigh, twitched and shivered, and he had to agree. "I like... when you punish me. The night… you pushed me down on my knees and fucked my mouth... the other day, with Whitney. Lex...." Another hard shudder. "Drives me crazy."

Lex licked along his lover's trembly throat. "Mmmm. Well... right now... I'm actually more worried about clothes, than anything else. Once I have the clothes situation under control, then I'll worry about... other things." His hand snaked down to stroke once over Clark's cock.

"I saw....some clothes, in the closet in the bathroom." Clark muttered, and swallowed, clearing his throat as he rose. He slipped into the bathroom quickly, and returned with a pair of new jeans with the tag still on them and a white polo shirt. "There's… lots. In there. For times when... I guess... this happens?"

Lex chuckled softly. "They do prepare for almost everything here, which is why I like this place, even if I don't patronize it that often." He leaned back on the bed. "You order room service. I've got a little errand to run downstairs."

"Kay." He set the clothes on the chair beside the door and slipped back into bed, pushing his lovers ruined clothes and the even more ruined condom out of the way as he plunked on the sheets. the menu was in the side drawer, with… lots of lube, astoundingly enough, and he opened the menu quickly, peering inside. "Want me to order you anything special, baby?"

"No, just a lot of whatever you pick. They don't do a huge fancy menu, but they know you do work up an appetite." He pulled the jeans on quickly, murmuring at the fit, and the white top went next, and he went for his wallet.

And picked up the condom. With no tip. "Um... Clark? Care to explain this?" he asked, as he tucked his wallet into the back pocket of the jeans.

He looked up... flushed a heavy, deep crimson, and fell on his side on the bed where he'd been sitting, covering his head with a blanket.

"Okay, no, you don't want to explain. I don't think the condom came that way, Clark."

He groaned under the blanket and just... his whole body, naked as the day he was born, was beet red.

"So you do blush all over. That's interesting."

"LEX!" Clark yelled from his hiding spot. "Go! Get out! Embarrassed here!"

Lex picked up the blanket at the end of the bed and peeked under it, as though sharing a secret shelter. "Mmm. I would never have guessed."

Clark was positively crimson. Who wouldn't? His super sperm had blown a hole through a condom, a latex condom that had never even been built to withstand something like SUPER SPERM. Which only embarrassed him further, and he whimpered, and hid his face.

And spoke, muffled, to Lex. "I checked. You don't have latex floating around inside you."

"I'm sure I don't." Lex reached out and rubbed his hand over Clark's skin, feeling the blush heating it. "At least it's not a girl you had that problem with," he said softly. Then, the thoughtless comment fell out of his mouth before he even realized he was saying it. "You don't have to worry about getting me pregnant."

Then a quiet pause. "Fuck. I didn't--didn't know what I was saying, Clark. I'm sorry."

Oh. Fuck. The blush died away, and had he been normal his face would have drained of blood. Instead he just returned to normal, thank Christ. His throat bobbed with the tight swallow, and he shook his head, as he pulled the blankets off and sat up. "Its okay, baby. No, don't have to worry about getting you pregnant, that's just me. Though I'm glad you don't have Super Sperm of Doom to rip through condoms." He tried for a smile. "Go, do whatever. I'm going to... you know. Order food."

Lex crawled across the bed and wrapped his arms around his lover. "I'm sorry. I just... my mouth went off before my head did. Baby... please. I don't... I'm sorry. Please." He ran his face over Clark's cheekbones, through his hair. "I'm sorry. I was thoughtless."

"Its okay." He wouldn't cry. It had been an innocent comment, and his lover felt bad enough already. So he just stroked over his head, gently, and smiled, kissing his lips tenderly. "Its definitely okay. Just a mistake, don't worry about it."

"It's not okay." Lex didn't move, as he held Clark tightly to him. "It's not okay in any sense of the fucking word."

Christ. "Lex, don't, okay? I don't… don't want to be sad again. Its okay. It was a mistake... if it had been anyone but you, Id have punched their lights out." He said it to lighten the mood, as he carefully stroked over Lex's face, and held him just as closely. "But hey, its true. You break the condom, I can get pregnant. So you weren't lying."

"I'm an idiot." He hugged Clark tightly. "I'm a fucking idiot. But you love me anyway." He left the unspoken Right? hanging off the end of the sentence. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry." Clark whispered, softly. "There's no one I love more than you on this earth... on any earth." And it was the truth. Down to the marrow. "I love you so much. You aren't an idiot... you didn't say anything bad. You were telling the truth, baby."

"It was the truth. But... it's not a joke, and I just... my fucking mouth ran off with me. It won't happen again, I promise." Tight, tight hug. "You know you're everything to me."

"Lex." Clark lifted up, seriously this time, and looked into his lovers eyes, hands on his slender shoulders. "Baby... you're my lover, my mate, my chosen husband. I love you beyond anything. You don't have to keep things, keep parts of yourself, from me. None of that it won't happen again crap. Okay? I love you. Don't walk on pins and needles around me."

"I won't, Clark. I just... I'll be careful of what I say. It's not walking on pins and needles if you stop to think before opening your stupid mouth." Frown at himself, but then he settled on Clark's lap. "You are my mate, Clark, my aushna', and everything I do, I do for you." Soft kiss to his lover's lips. "I protect you. Even from my own thoughtlessness."

"It wasn't thoughtlessness!" Throttling Lex was becoming a better and better idea. "It hurts me worse when you feel like you have to watch what you say, like I'm some tender hearted female. I can take it, Lex. You don't have to think before you open your mouth."

Lex glared, at that. "You're not a tender hearted female, Clark, you're my aushna'. And for all that, you do have the tenderest heart of anyone I've met before, and you've entrusted it to my keeping! And I'm going to protect it, and you, and if you don't like it... trenk'ha'nashana!"

"I do NOT!" Oh my God! "I do not have a tender heart at all! I am not a weeping mess!" He let go, and glared, darkly. "I have trusted myself to you, and you to me, and fuck you too!"

"You're not a weeping mess, but you feel things, Clark, you feel things deeper than anyone else I've ever known! When you hurt, the world hurts, the skies cry when you cry. When you are in pain, the earth howls." Lex shoved off the bed when Clark let go of him and stalked to the other side of the room.

Clark rose to his feet and glared right back, because yeah, he was pissed a plenty. "Yes I feel, but that doesn't mean my own aushna' can't tell me things! That he will keep things from me, that he will not be a hundred percent honest with his heart and his mind when he's with me because he's scared of what I'll do! I won't have my aushna' feeling like that, goddammit!"

"And I won't have you hurting because of me!" Lex yelled back.

"You can't KEEP things from me because you think I'll hurt!" Clark cried back, and threw the nearest thing, a pillow, at him. "Fuck you, for thinking I'm some tender little wimp! I'll have you know I AM EL, who can control the earth and the skies with his mind, who has powers that are unlike any mortal mans! I AM NOT A WIMP!"

Lex ducked the pillow, and then once it fell, hurled it back. "I am El too, chosen of Kal and given the blessing of Jor! It is my right, and my duty, to protect my aushna' and keep him safe from harm, this is my privilege of El and my honor of aushna'!" he shouted back.

"That doesn't mean you KEEP THINGS FROM ME!"

He was furious. Outrageously, indescribably, furious, and ten times more hurt than he thought he could ever be. "What, what have you kept from me? What have you told me white lies about??"

"Nothing!" Lex bellowed, and in his anger, his control slipped. Every single memory, thought, guilt pain, desire went rushing through their link, fueled by his new abilities and his anger to practically shove them in Clark's head.

Clarks mind couldn't take it.

He gasped, hard, as he stumbled back...hit the wall by the bathroom, and sank down against it. Too many thoughts, too many thoughts and emotions and needs, too much pain that piled on top of his own, and he let out a soft sob as it filtered into his head. He was so used to giving what he felt, that he was unprepared for receiving it, and this onslaught had the whites of his eyes showing as he fought not to faint.

"Clark!!" Lex yelled it, at the top of his lungs, and fought for a long moment, nearly a minute and a half, until he could slam a lid on the stream that was pouring out of his head, and he crossed the room in an instant, falling to his knees beside Clark. "Are you all right? Clark!!"

He saw his lover speaking, but didn't hear a word. His eyes came up, to watch his mouth move, eyelashes fluttering. So much pain. So much guilt, fatigue, sadness. So much agony, sadness, hate. So much. So much, because of Mar, because of the aftermath. So much. He couldn't speak, still trapped in the wall of pain, as he lost control of his muscles and sagged against his lover. Too much to process. Too much.

Sleep.

"No!" Lex shook his lover violently. "Clark, no! Don't leave me!" Another hard shake, and he slapped him hard. "Clark, please!" His voice choked on a sob. "Please."

The rude slap brought him back to his senses. He heard his lovers sobs, through their link, and he just shook his head, attempting to speak. His senses were scattered, but he could try and talk, as he fought to process what he'd been given. "'m kay."

"Clark!" Another sob, and Lex shook him again. "Come on, get up. Let's get you over to the bed."

"No. 'm okay. Gimme minute." Better. Better. The swamp was being cleared by his fast brain, settling things into their proper orders, and he bit his lip tightly to keep the sob in. "I'm sorry. I hurt you. Mar, Mar hurt you. Lex. I want to go home. Lets go home."

"No," Lex sobbed softly. "You didn't hurt me." Clark was all right, and that was about all he could process. "I'm sorry. I don't know what happened. Are you all right? Do you know who you are? What's going on? Clark... please."

"Don't cry." Clark whispered, softly, as he sat up...winced...straightened. "Its okay. I'm okay. Lex… I'm okay." he straightened, and climbed slowly, carefully up to his knees. "Lex... want to go home. Please. I can't be away anymore. Home."

"You're okay." Lex ran his hands over Clark's face, his shoulders, leaned in to rub his cheek over Clark's shoulder, holding him tightly. "Christ, I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you, I'm sorry I couldn't control it."

"Its okay." Clark answered, softly, squeezing his lovers hand gently. He was shaking, horribly, but as he stood up, shook himself out, he was better. He couldn't meet his lovers eyes though, in any sort of fashion, because the guilt of what he'd done to this precious creature was like a vice around his throat. "You love me, but you shouldn't. I'm so... so sorry, for everything I've done to you."

Lex wouldn't stand for that, and he made Clark look at him, resting their foreheads together. "Clark, no. You haven't done anything to me. You haven't. You've made my life bearable; you saved my life, changed it... given me everything it's possible for one being to give to another. Maybe I don't always know what to do with it, but we're learning it, together."

"I ruined your life." Rough, hard voice that was full of tears, as he set his forehead on his lovers. "I took all your happiness away. Are you that sad, all the time, Lex? Are you so sad all the time?"

"No, Clark. You didn't. You gave me the greatest happiness in the world, and that is knowing you and loving you." Stroke to his face. "No, I'm not that sad all the time. I'm not sad at all when I am with you, don't you see that?"

"I see you. I felt you." He couldn't talk about it anymore, and he just turned, and looked for his clothes. "I want to go home. Will Aden and Rico be angry?"

"No, they won't be angry; don't even know we're coming." Lex turned Clark back around to face him, and raised his arm so that his mark pressed against his lover's. "Feel that, Clark? That bond, that love? That's what keeps me from being sad."

The bond was strong, the love was deep, but Clark didn't know if it was enough anymore. Just... he didn't know, and he wanted to curl up and die at the hate and sadness in his lover's heart. "Home. I want to go home."

Lex's voice broke slightly. "Don't give up on me, Clark."

"Home." He whispered, softly, as he tugged his jeans on.

Lex didn't say anything else as he went through the ruins of his pants, and pulled out the car keys and everything else, and nodded. "Home, then."

Holy shit. Wally sat back in his apartment, and pulled the headset off. The greatest thing about being the Fastest Man in the World is that you could bug somebody and they not even know it. He pulled out the CD he'd just been recording for Bruce, and gave a low whistle. No wonder you wanted someone down here to look after your little buddy! He turned the equipment off, and put the CD in the jewel box. He picked up his leather jacket from the couch, and headed for the door.

Bruce needed to know this now.

 

-fin-

go on to the next part