The Memoirs

His. Body. Hurt.

The stitches holding his skin together were tugging unpleasantly. His body ached, inside and out, his head throbbed even after at least sixteen hours of sleep, and he was exhausted. And hungry. And the catheter was chafing him something horrid.

And Lionel? Wasn't there. Which upset him, but also relieved him--he could mewl with pain and not be horrified that his lover was watching him. Plus? He got to sleep a bit more, and rest without having to do much of anything, which was wonderfully comfortable.

He was just drifting off again when he heard a knock at his door.

Lionel was standing outside the door, knocking. "Dominic?" he called softly. "Are you awake?" He looked at Clark, Lex, and the little girl in Clark's arms. "I think you should let me come in first and prepare him, so that... Victoria isn't such a shock."

Dominic groggily looked up at the door. His lover. He could barely move, though the delightful dose of morphine pumping through his blood was a treat, and he sighed back into the cushion of painless grogginess. "Yes," he said, his voice a croak, but stronger then it had been just a bit ago.

"He's awake, that's something," Lionel murmured softly. "Can we come in? I need to speak with you alone first, though Clark and Lex are here." He didn't mention the third visitor yet.

"And me!" Victoria piped up, though she couldn't be heard through the thick hospital-room door. She was trying really hard to be really brave, like Clark and Baldy asked her to be, but she was scared of hospital rooms.

"You're doing great, Vicky," Lex murmured softly.

"It's Victoria!" she corrected imperiously.

"Uh huh," Dominic murmured. He didn't really care, after all, everything was perfectly wonderful right now. His knee was wrapped again, propped up on a pillow with the blankets tugged over him to preserve modesty, but how much modesty could a man have when he'd been given three shots in the arse just a bit ago? Honestly? He didn't really care though, closing his eyes blearily as he heard the door open, and cracked them open to look..."Ohhh. Helloooo," he said, ever so cheerfully.

Lionel opened the door just enough to squeeze in through, and closed it behind him. "Dominic? How are you feeling this morning?" he asked softly. He was impressed, though, because the bandages over Dominic's knee weren't nearly as thick as they had been before, and they weren't damp or soggy with draining discharge either.

"'m good. How are *you*?" Dominic asked, opening one green eye to look up at his lover, before letting it close again. "It's rather quite sunny today, you know, being… erm… August I think or some such. Hello! I missed you last night, not that I remember much. The nurse gave me *three* shots. In my *arse*!"

"Yes, August," Lionel confirmed with a little laugh, pulling his chair up close to Dominic's bedside. "I missed you too, little cricket, but... while I did mean to come back last night, there were some... rather disturbing developments late in the evening." He gave his lover's hand a little tug. "You... there is something I need to tell you and I want you to remain calm."

"Love, how else can I be?" he looked up, adoringly, at the morphine drip. "This stuff should be packaged and sold. I'd buy it by the truck load."

"It is," Lionel said with another laugh. "Illegally, though, and at quite a high price." He gave a little cough. "Lex and Clark... have taken in a little girl."

"Really? Is her name Annie? Because if she breaks out into song at every possible hour, we're letting her sleep in the car. And I *refuse* to be a Colonel. You'd make a fine Colonel. We need to get you a dashing hat, though."

"Her name is Victoria, Dominic." He paused a millisecond. "Victoria Hardwick."

Dominic opened one eye again, and something in his drug addled brain clicked. "I didn't know she'd had a child. Victoria *is* dead, isn't she?"

"Yes, she is dead. And no, she didn't have a child. We're working on the logistics of that now," Lionel explained.

"Mmm. That's rather too complicated for my state of mind right now. Where's Lex?" Dominic asked, opening the other eye to look up at his lover. "I missed you, quite a bit. I'm feeling rather good right now, though. My toes are tingly."

"Lex is outside the door, with Clark and the child," Lionel replied.

"Alright, then. You can send them in, I don't mind."

Lex had been waiting to hear that, and he opened the door carefully, holding it open for Clark and Victoria, then came in himself. "Dominic? I'd like you to meet Victoria Hardwick. Victoria, this is Dominic."

Victoria held out one pudgy little hand for a handshake.

Dominic almost flipped out.

Almost.

He'd been working for Lionel for many, many years. The young adults he knew now had once been children, and he'd been there to watch them grow. He knew Victoria Hardwick, or had known her in any regard, very well--she and Lex used to have play-dates when they were children.

In Clark's arms before him, like a nightmare, was Victoria. She was her, her was she, down to the eyes, the hair, the dimples. Children always looked a *little* different from there parents, no matter how much they resembled them, but this... this.

It was frightening. He swallowed, hard, against the lump in his throat, and shook the little girls hand with his good hand, which was trembling slightly from the exertion. "Hi."

Victoria shook his hand shyly, and then hid her face back against Clark's neck.

Lionel left his hand on his husband's shoulder. "I tried to warn you."

"Inadequate warning," Dominic answered, but smiled at her. "Hi. Sorry I'm a bit naked and bloody, I promise I don't ever look this gross," he said to her.

"Hey, Dominic," Clark answered, lips twitching a little as he squeezed Dominic's shoulder. "Nice to see you awake."

Victoria was still holding onto Clark's neck, hiding her face in his broad shoulder. "Nice to see you!" she squeaked.

Lex held his arms out to the little girl. She was still kind of spooked from having met Lionel this morning, and was still trying to get over the whole "bad man" thing from her father.

Victoria squeaked again and shook her head no as she clung to Clark.

Lionel just snickered softly. "Yes, I know, anything that could be said is inadequate," he said, petting Dominic's shoulder. "At least she seemed to like you."

"Nice to see you," Dominic answered her, watching as she clung to Clark's neck, and was almost… kind of... sad at the image. She looked like Clark, in that she had dark hair and soft skin...she even had the same type of cheekbones. She looked like his daughter. Ahh well.

Did he say that out loud?

He thought for a moment. No, no hadn't. "Yes, liking me is good. You know, I think the surgery went well. I keep feeling tingly all over. Then again, it might be the agony muted down with my cacophony of drugs, but alas."

Lex just gave Dominic a little look. No, he hadn't said it out loud but he'd thought it strongly and sadly enough that Lex had been able to pick up on it. Yes, she did look like Clark, and it made him unspeakably sad, even as Clark's smiles made him smile.

"But, if you're feeling things, that's good," Lionel pointed out. "It's more sensation than you had the last time, after surgery. This sounds like it's been an excellent success."

"Success shmuccess. You tell that to my toes. I'm positive there's pins in them, but a darling nurse by the name of Matilda, who must weigh over nine hundred pounds and can haul m blond arse about like I'm nothing but a toothpick, told me quite plainly that there isn't. Nor is there water on the walls, though I was certain a bit ago there was, and no, there's absolutely nothing under the bed but the bag holding my piss. YES. I have gotten that far in life where a bag now holds my piss. I don't even have to hold it anymore. I feel like a king. Or a child. No offence, Ms. Hardwick."

"No fuffense!" she answered back, keeping her arms tight around Clark's neck as she whispered. "He's a funny man. He's scary."

Lionel was outrageously amused by his drugged husband. "If you begin to see Herbert, do let me know, because I will then have to ask everyone else to leave the room because I'm sure you want as few witnesses to your indignity as possible," he said with twitching lips.

"Herbert's come and gone, love," Dominic answered, peering through his blond lashes at his smiling lover. "He said to tell you hello, and to thank you for the last time he showed up, and to let you know that you've quite a skill with that dashing tongue of yours but if its all the same to you, he'd rather not again. He also tried to do a fine tap dancing number, but I'm quite afraid my foot won't allow it. It hurts rather too much.

Victoria poked Clark again. "Wha's he doin' with his tongue? And who's Herbet?"

Lex was overcome with quite the coughing fit when he overheard Victoria's questions, and had to excuse himself to the bathroom.

Clark's mouth trembled open… he considered answering… and he closed his eyes and mouth tight. "Nothing, sweetie."

"When can I go home?" Dominic suddenly demanded.

Victoria narrowed her eyes. "You's not tellin' the truf!" she said wonderingly.

Lionel cocked his head to the side. "At least after you sober up; I'm sure the doctors will be observing you for a day or two, but then we'll be moving you home."

"So you mean to tell me I have to wait two extra days, plus whatever long it takes for me to get better, before you'll have se--"

"OOOOkay! Going outside!" Clark sing-songed over Dominic's loud declaration of 'sex with me', and he carted Victoria out into the hall, still in his arms, and plunked in the seat beside his father in laws door and set the child on his lap. "Okay, baby?"

Inside the bathroom, Lex's coughing fit got a whole lot worse.

Victoria nodded. "I don' like hospitals," she confided. "They're bad."

Dominic was still glaring up at his lover, demanding an answer.

Lionel gave a delicate cough. "Yes, that's right."

"That's right what?" Dominic glared even worse at that. "Are we going to have sex after I get better or not? I'm not cracked up on illegal drugs now, dammit."

"That's right, you're going to have to wait until you're better before we have sex. However, after you're well again, yes, we will be having sex, and if I can manage it, quite a bit of it."

"That's not bloody fair. Nurse Psycho said the same thing though, and she at least had the decency to tell me the truth!"

"And what truth would that be?" Lionel humored.

Lex exploded out of the bathroom at that. "I think that's my cue to go check on Victoria because I don't want to hear the disturbing sex talk." He slammed the hospital room door behind him and plopped down on the chair next to Clark and Victoria.

"Heya, Baldy," Clark answered, bouncing Victoria on his knee a little bit, hugging both her and Super Bear, as they'd named him that morning. They'd woken up a tangle of limbs, somehow with Victoria taking up the most space, and Clark was still teasing her terribly over it as Lex came out. "Can't believe it, you're a midget and you had the most room!"

"Yeah, I woke up with half my a--uh, behind," he said with a bit of a grimace, "hanging off the bed and there was this little tiny girl spread out everywhere," he joined in.

Victoria just giggled at that, hiding her face in Super Bear. "You's skinny, Baldy. You's not take up much room anyway."

Clark nearly burst out laughing, if the nurse hadn't glared at him from the nursing station. "He is skinny, isn't he? A skinny little waif looking thing, its pathetic!"

Victoria flexed her little arm, then poked at Lex's. "I'm bigger'n he is! Lookit!"

"I see, baby! I betcha you could lift twice what he could, huh?" Clark asked, grinning down at her even as his eyes danced across to Lex.

Victoria nodded, and to prove it, she lifted Super Bear clear over her head and made him fly around. "See! I's big and strong like Superman!"

Lex just coughed and rolled his eyes. "Victoria, do you know what shopping is?"

She nodded. "Course I do. S'where you go out and buy me stuff."

Lex strangled on his reaction again. "She's definitely Victoria," he wheezed.

Clark grinned. Broadly. "We go out and buy you stuff indeedy, baby girl. We're gonna go, as soon as Mufasa is done talking to Jiminy, okay?"

"They're not Mufasa and Jiminy. Mufasa is a big lion and Jiminy is a little cricket! They's people!" She scowled at Clark. "Baldy's laughin' at me."

"Baldy laughs at everyone. And yes, they are people, but you know how we gave Lex a nickname? Cause, well, he's bald?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I members. Baldy cause he's got no hair. So, the scary man is Jiminy, cause he's little, and Lionel is Mufasa, cause he's got all the hair, like a lion?"

Lex couldn't help himself. The stubborn set of her chin and the trembling pouty lower lip were all Hardwick, yes, because he could see the old Victoria trotting out every one of her tricks on him, but the pout and the stubborn jaw, the dark hair and the pretty cheekbones made her look not like herself, but the man holding her in his lap. And Lex knew that if he didn't laugh about it, he just might be crying.

Clark had no idea what was going on in Lex's head, just paying attention to the thoughtful child in his lap. "Yep. His nickname's Jiminy, too, cause he's really smart and clever. And Lionel's is Mufasa, cause he's really proud and strong and hairy."

Victoria nodded. "Then I want to be... um..." Her little face screwed up hard in concentration. "Pocahontas!!"

Clark's lips spread. "Pocahontas, huh? What about Belle, instead? Cause you are a little belle."

She batted her eyes up at him. "Does that mean you're the big hairy Beast?"

Lex's smile just widened, though it was cracking around the edges. "Victoria, somebody needs to introduce you to Warrior Angel."

"I am not a beast!" Clark declared, then sideglanced Lex with a smile. "Warrior Angel is cool."

Victoria poked his shoulder. "You're big. And you got lots of hair, though not like Mr. Mufasa man," she said authoritatively. "And you helped Superman rescue me like the Beast helped rescue Belle from Gaston and the rest of the villagers when they went to hurt the Beast," she said, explaining her logic. "So that makes you the Beast."

"What joy," Clark teased her. "Just don't call me the Beast in public or they'll think I'm smelly and icky. Am I smelly and icky?" he asked, eyebrows squished and a little sniffle at her.

She leaned forward, sniffed him, then thought a minute. "Nah, you're not smelly. And you're only icky when you do kissy stuff."

"I don't want to be icky," Dominic was saying, in the confines of the room, though his voice was desperately groggy and half asleep. "I wanna go home. Can't we go home?"

"No, Dominic, we can't go home yet," Lionel said quietly, patiently. "You're not going to be allowed to go home until the doctors have observed you and made sure that you're quite well and ready to be released," he explained.

I will not whine. I will not whine. So instead, he pouted. Quite deeply, with a little sniffle, too, but he nodded anyway as he lifted his good hand and reached for Lionel's. "Sure you won't fire me?"

"I will not fire you," Lionel said emphatically, meeting Dominic's hand with his own and linking their fingers carefully together. "You are going to be expected back at work when your recovery is over."

"Oh, I'm quite glad, love. I'd rather you didn't," he murmured, and finally, finally, gave him a slightly loopy smile. "I love you. Loooove."

Lionel kissed Dominic's hand gently. "I love you too, little cricket."

"That's great. Now go away, so I can take a piss in peace."

Lionel chuckled softly. "I will send Clark and Lex out on their shopping expedition, and then I'll return to read to you; does that sound acceptable to you?" Lionel asked it as he was rising to his feet to comply with Dominic's wishes.

"Mmmm. Go."

"Yes, sir." Lionel made his way to the door and closed it behind him with a deep sigh. "He's taking care of some personal business and asked me to leave," he offered to Clark and Lex by way of explanation.

"Meaning he has to take a piss and doesn't want you watching him?" Clark asked, rather crudely, before realizing a little girl was in his arms, and wincing. "Sorry, baby. Erm… let's go shopping for things to buy you, hmm?"

"Ooooooo, you said a bad word, Clark!" She shook her finger at him. "No cookies and milk for you!"

Lex strangled the laugh in his throat before it could come out the half-sob that it actually was. "No cookies for you, Clark."

Lionel looked sharply at his son, noting the strain at the corner of his eyes and the slightly plastic quality to Lex's smile. "Are you all right, son?"

Lex nodded. "Just fine, Dad."

Clark glanced over but didn't say anything, instead sweeping a bite for that finger as she pointed it at him. He let her down on the floor, taking her hand firmly, and then offering the other to Lex. "Come on. Lionel, we're going shopping for clothes and other various things, alright? We'll be back later today."

Lex gave his lover's hand a quick squeeze, but moved to take Victoria's other hand, so that each one was held by an adult, and they could lift her and swing her between them. "We'll probably have lunch out too; do you want us to bring you anything back? And, we'll probably have to run back to Smallville, at least for a few hours, to see Shayla and make sure that everything is being taken care of there."

Lionel nodded. "If I need you, I will call your cell phone, Lex. Don't worry."

Clark nodded, and gave Lionel a one-armed hug. "See you later, Lionel. Take care of Dominic--remind him that babbling is bad." Clark's lips twitched as he tugged on Victoria's hand, to get her to start walking with him.

"I'll remind him," Lionel said dryly. "But chances are he'll not remember it as drugged up as he is."

Victoria didn't budge. She was a princess, after all, and princesses have to be carried, and she looked up at Clark expectantly.

"Gotcha. Let him know that the British versions of Potter are coming in the mail--I promised them to him by the weekend, and I really hope they're here by tomorrow," Clark answered, as he nodded toward the door, then caught a glance down at Victoria and saw that arched brow, that little pout, and he almost cracked up. Instead, he said all too innocently, "Coming?"

Victoria just tugged her hands out of Clark's and Lex's, crossed her arms over her chest, and stamped a little foot.

"I'll let him know." Lionel surveyed the situation with a critical eye. "Ah. I'll leave you to... this." He knocked on Dominic's bedroom door, and re-entered the room, leaving Clark, Lex, and one headstrong little girl in the hallway.

When the first foot-stomp didn't get anything, Victoria stamped her foot again, and added an impatient little huff.

"Ms. Hardwick, may I ask what you're doing?" Clark asked, demurely, crossing his arms as well.

"You have to carry me," she said, rolling her eyes theatrically.

"Ms. Hardwick, do I look like Superman to you? Am I a horse, here?" Clark asked again, rolling his eyes right back.

She examined him closely. "You kinda do. Only you don't have the cape. And you don't fly and stuff."

Don't you dare, Lex.

Lex straightened up at that, clasping his hands behind his back instead of holding them out to offer the young lady a ride.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that. Excuse me, I'm not tall dark and meaty," Clark answered, and offered his hand to her again, eyebrow arched.

"Yes you is. You's big and strong like Superman. Only you don't fly and all that stuff." He kept her arms crossed, and started to pout.

"Nope, I don't fly. And neither should you, Ms. Hardwick," Clark said, eyebrow still up. "As far as I can tell, you're a big girl. Four years old. Four year old princesses shouldn't want to be carried... they should be walking around, lady like. Beasts don't carry princesses, after all."

"Yes they does. Cause I say so."

He glared, and offered his elbow instead. "Would you like to escort you to the elevators, m'lady?"

"No." She turned on her heel and flounced back to the chairs.

Lex shot a glare to Clark. "I know I'm not a big hairy beast, nor am I the transportation of first choice, but can I perhaps offer a ride to the young lady?"

Victoria screwed her face up at Lex, then turned the scrunch-eyed confused look on Clark. "What'd he say?"

"He wants to give you a piggy back ride," Clark answered her, glaring, even as he shifted that glare to Lex. "Someone who is incredibly, indecently soft and doesn't know how to say no, might I add."

Victoria squealed and clapped. "Why dincha just say it in the first place?" she asked, holding her arms out for picking up.

Lex obliged by picking her up and swinging her carefully around to his back, and once her arms and legs were wrapped tightly around his neck and waist, he turned around to look at Clark. "So says the man who pouted when I said no," Lex reminded, eyebrow arched. Then he looked over his shoulder. "Is Madame ready to go?"

"Sure am!" she chirped, happy as a bug. "Oh! Don't forget Superbear!"

Clark muttered under his breath about goddamn super bear, and having no authority, as he picked up the bear and held him under his arm, as they started together down the hall. "Ms. Hardwick, people are going to think you're spoiled, you know." Heh. Like she wasn't spoiled already. He tickled her a little, just for that.

Lex nearly fell over at that. "Think she's spoiled? Clark, she's riding on Lex Luthor's back. She's so rotten I can smell her from ten feet away."

Clark grinned, broadly, even though something in Clark's heart hitched agonizingly against his rib cage. No. She wasn't spoiled. she'd been kept in a lab. So he said, quietly, eyes still struggling for some of the mirth they had, "Ever been shopping before, Victoria?"

She shook her head from where her chin rested on top of Lex's bald head. "Nuht-uh. Daddy always went shopping for me and brought me back pessants and stuff."

"Well, now you get to go shopping. And you know what else? We'll buy you a sundae," Clark answered, smiling at her. He was positive the too-long pants and the sweater they'd put her in, though Lex's, were warm enough until they bought her clothes. "First order on the agenda--pretty dresses."

She wrinkled her nose. "Don't want dresses. Daddy always bought me dresses. I want like what you got," she said, pointing to Clark's jeans and flannel shirt.

"Woo! Now that's my girl!" Clark crowed, as he plunked into the elevator, holding it open for Lex and the little girl. "Jeans and t-shirts! Huzzuh! And tennis shoes with Barbie on them?"

"Yeah!! Barbie!!" She swung her feet around Lex's waist as Lex ducked so that she didn't thunk her head on the elevator doors.

Lex just rolled his eyes. "Well... to each their own, but Victoria, I promise you, you'll like some of the more elegant clothes, too."

"Sure. Blouses and stuff." Clark made a face, and exchanged a look with Victoria over Baldy's head. "But still, Barbie."

"I still think somebody needs to introduce her to Warrior Angel," Lex groused.

Victoria giggled at the face Clark made, and she squeezed Lex's neck tighter. "It's okey, Baldy. You can tell me about Worry Anal later."

Lex cracked up, just completely lost it.

Clark, for his part? Looked horrified. He stared at the girl for a minute, staring at what she'd said, and then realized abruptly that she'd meant Warrior Angel and he let out a very, very long sigh or relief. "Erm... not Worry Anal, baby... Warrior Angel."

"Worrier Anal?" she repeated, head cocked to the side.

Lex was still losing it. "Angel," he choked out. "Like, with wings."

"Anal," she said, still missing the G.

"Noo...aaann--gggg--eeelll." Clark said, to show her how to say it, even as he stomped on Lex's foot.

Lex's laugh turned into a howl of pain as Clark's foot stomped down on his. "Oww, ow ow, goddammit!"

Victoria sucked in a deep breath. "AAAAAAH!!! You said a BAD WORD, Baldy!!" She hit the top of his head. "Bad Baldy!"

It was Clark's turn to be suppressing even more laughter, eyes watering with mirth as he fought to clear his throat, and said instead, quite regally, "That was a bad word, Baldy. We don't use that type of language around princesses."

"Yes, well, I have quite a few more choice words for you, Clark Kent, but they'll wait until later as they're all of the non-princess variety," he said with a deep glare.

"Have you so soon forgotten? I'm a princess too," Clark sniffled, then lifted his head high just for Victoria as they stepped off the elevator.

"Well, you do look good in a dress," Lex admitted.

Victoria burst into giggles. "Boys don't wear dresses!"

"Obviously you haven't been hanging around the right boys," Lex said with a snort, looking up at Victoria as he ducked down to get her safely out without a thumped head.

"I have never worn a dress in my life," Clark said, with finality, sniffling regally as they walked out of the hospital. Angels of Mercy, unlike Smallville General, was right in the middle of downtown, and Clark shared at grin with his lover before taking Victoria onto his hip. "Wouldn't do to give the paparazzi more to talk about," he said.

Lex reluctantly surrendered Victoria to Clark, and just in time too, because he was lost in another fit of near-hysterical laughing. "No, you just wear skirt/blouse combinations."

"Do not," Clark pouted, even as he snuggled Queen Victoria on his hip. "Spoiled brat. Lex, where are we going first?" Clark realized, right in that moment, that he'd never been shopping with Lex before. ...Ever. And he had no idea what kind of protocol it was for multi billionaires.

"That's entirely up to you and the kind of couture that we're looking for. Metropolis has no dearth of great shops, one-offs, chain stores, and custom clothiers. My personal suggestions are Georgia's, where they will custom fit you with Armani, but since we're not looking for a suit, then I'm thinking the options are pretty much open."

"No...I mean...do you need security? Don't you have to have the stores closed for you?"

Lex coughed. "No, Clark, I don't. That's my father. I do, however, have most of the sales staff in eight blocks trained to drop whomever or whatever they're tending to to take care of my needs, so we'll get great service."

Clark blinked, then, as they made their way for the garage and the car. "What do you do when people start hounding you?"

"They don't get the chance to. Most of the salespeople intercept them before they get to me, and if they do somehow manage to make it through, do you really think that someone is going to try and fuck with me when I'm at my Luthor best?"

"BALDY!!! YOU SAID ANUTHER BAD WORD!!" She reached out and slapped his arm. "BAD!"

"Bad!" Clark echoed, smacking his lover's arm and giving him a pretty glaring pout of twitching lips. "Bad words, bad! We say "fudge", not fuck! We say "heck", not hell! Honestly!"

"CLARK!!" She popped him on the arm too. "You sayin' the bad words now!! Daddy always said that it's BAD to say words like that, cause it means you weren't brung up right!" Victoria's little hands went to her hips as she glared at both adults.

Lex snickered. "Well, don't you feel put in your place, Mr. Kent?"

"I wasn't brought up right!" Clark cried, and tickled her mercilessly. "I'm a big hairy beast!" But he grinned over her raven haired head at his lover. "Oh, shut up. As for shopping, I'm in your shadow--lead the way, monsieur."

"Okay. We're leaving the car, because parking is a bitch. We'll come back for it later, because the place we're going is only three streets over. It's a place called Haute Couture, and they're going to set us up beautifully."

"Is Haute Couture a place for little girls, Lex?" Clark asked, as he himself swung Victoria up on his shoulders like a little monkey, keeping her up there firmly by holding her back, as they walked. They were getting a bit of attention, more then a bit actually, and Clark was really, really glad he hadn't gone Farmboy Chic today.

"Haute Couture is a place for little girls, little boys, big girls, big boy, and even big, big boys like you, Clark. They're one of the custom places I was telling you about; we'll find something we like for this young lady, they'll tailor it to her, and have it delivered to the penthouse tonight. Until then, when we're done at Haute Couture, we'll slide over to Fantasmagoric, which is one-of-a-kind clothing for kids and young clubbers."

"Cool." Cause… well... it was. He grinned, broadly, and glanced over his shoulder at Victoria to see how she was boding with the people in the street. "Okay, baby?"

"They're all lookin' at me," she whispered, and her arms were tight around his neck. "But I's okay."

"They're looking at you cause they can't believe how two butt ugly shlubs like Baldy and I got blessed with a princess," Clark answered, slightly worried over how easy it had been to incorporate her into their family unit, but trying his damnedest not to let on.

But Lex felt it. "You know, Cat Grant's going to have a field day with this, us picking up stray kids and all," he commented under his breath. His hand slid up and down Clark's forearm, rubbing gently. "Let's just go shopping and not worry about anything else yet, okay?"

Victoria was doing her part, sitting on Clark's back, waving occasionally to people that stared at her for too long.

"I don't care what kind of field day she has," Clark answered, vehemently. "Perry's going to ask me write about it, you know." He stopped speaking for a moment, gnawing on his lip. "I don't know if I want to work at the Daily Planet anymore, Lex, but its hard...I mean, anywhere I go they're going to ask me to use you and your father for their ends. You know?"

Lex nodded. "I know he is, Clark. But at least you know that you'll be treating it fairly, not sensationally." He put his hand around Clark's waist. "The choice is yours; you don't have to work at the Planet if you don't want to. But, yes. You're right. Anywhere you go, people are going to ask you to get to me and to my father, because they know you have the connections."

"Perry's really nice," Clark answered, quietly. "He's fair. I want to do a good job, for him, you know? He's a good man and I know I can do it."

"He's also one of the most respected men in the industry, and Planet has the best reputation for fair and unbiased reporting, as far as the front pages go." Lex watched his feet as he walked through the streets that had seemed familiar only a year or two ago, but were now as alien as his lover. "I think the question of whether or not you can do a good job has been answered by the fact that you're the youngest person in history to be offered a full-time column at the Daily Planet."

At that, Clark beamed. He couldn't help it. "I'm kinda proud about that, you know." He hefted Victoria up a bit on his shoulders, watching Lex watch the streets, and feeling the strange detachment from his lover concerning the city. He couldn't help but saying, "You got used to corn fields and landmarks to tell you where you're going."

"No, I got used to knowing where I headed instead of just going places," Lex clarified. "Two years ago, I knew these streets as well as I did the back of my hand--and then some. They were home, Clark. The streets, the stores, the people, the clubs. They were home. They defined who I was. And now? They.... don't."

"Nope." I do. And in some part of Clark, he gloried at the thought. "You're positively suburban, Lex." And that was a desperately amusing thought, because he couldn't help giggling.

Lex just nodded. "I'm domesticated, to a certain degree. That's... not amusing, Clark. That's very frightening." He sighed. "I don't know what changed, or when it changed, even. Just... it has."

"Meaning you'd rather spend an evening home with me in front of the fire with a cuddly blanket then fucking every pretty blond thing that passes under your, as Dominic said, "drug addled" nose."

"YOU SAID ANOTHER BAD WORD!!" Victoria had been quiet up until then, looking around at the buildings and the people, cause she'd never been let out in them before, but when she heard Clark... She popped him in the head. "You said bad words!!"

Lex looked mildly outraged. "They weren't all blondes."

"Ow!" Clark cried, though only to appease her. "Sorry, Victoria," he said, grinning back at her as he hitched her up easier, Superbear under his arm. "No, some were just brunettes. Red heads. Baldies. Yadda yadda yadda. You're just upset cause you've never found anyone as gooood as me," Clark teased his lover, as they turned the street and started up it.

Lex gave a laugh at that. "That's true. I never did find anyone as good as you. You, my Clark, are as wholesome, as fit, and as disgustingly good as I could never have dreamed."

"And," he whispered, "I'm a fantastic lay."

Lex lowered his voice too. "Yes, yes, you are. You are, in fact, probably the best lay I've ever had. And that I intend to keep having. So don't get attached to having Little Miss Muffet sleeping in our bed, because the things I want to do to you, she really, really shouldn't see," he kept whispering.

Clark's lips twitched, hard, and he didn't say anything, though he sideglanced his lower and a blush rose in his dimpled cheeks. "Tease." He looked up at Victoria as she waved at someone else, and grinned at her. "Okay up there with the clouds, Ms. Victoria?"

"Promises," Lex said, leaned in to quickly lick Clark's cheek before straightening back up.

"I'm okay!" she sang out. Is you gettin' tired carryin' me? Daddy couldn't carry me so far like this cause he said I was a big girl."

"You are a big girl, but I happen to be very strong. But don't you get used to this," Clark said, still blushing as he winked up at her and they wove in and out of the crowds of people walking to and fro. "How much further, Lex?"

"They're about a half block down," Lex said. "And on the other side of the street, but there's a crosswalk about four stores up." Then he winked up at Victoria too. "I'll carry you around when he gets tired of it. Or, we can buy you one of those little car things that we can push you around in."

Her eyes lit up. "My first car? Weally?" Her r slipped to a w.

"Uh, no. Little Miss Muffet will be walking, thank you." Clark answered, even as he glared at Lex. "You're going to spoil our kids rotten, aren't you?"

"If she wants a car, Clark, I'm going to buy her a car." It's not like there's anyone else I can take care of, he thought bitterly to himself. "I'm going to spoil them rotten, yes. Besides, if I get her the right car, I'll have her started off on the right foot for the rest of her life."

"What, to drive like a maniac and run over cows and farm boys?" Clark asked, teasing, as he glanced up. "Did you know, Ms. Victoria, that Baldy here tries to hit cows in Smallville, where we live? All the time! Jiminy told me so."

Victoria tittered. "Shouldn't hit cows! They's good to eat!!"

Lex just raised an eyebrow at her. "How do you think they get hamburgers and steaks, little missy?"

Her jaw dropped. "YOU DO NOT MAKE HAMBURGERS OUT OF COWS DAT YOU HIT ON THE ROAD!"

"No! Dey don't!" Clark cried back at Lex, looking aghast and horrified. "Don't you KNOW, Lex, that that's where beef jerky comes from?!"

Lex just nodded somberly. "Which is why I never eat beef jerky. I don't like eating anything I've killed."

"YOU MEAN BALDY MAN KILLING COWSES!!" Victoria just burst into tears.

Clark's lips twitched, and spread. "Shhh, Victoria, baby, he's just teasin'!" he said, and turned her so she was on his hip again, cradling her and super bear to his side. "Shhh, baby, its okay. I promise, we were just playing!"

She cried against his shoulder. "Promise? Baldy didn't kill no cows?"

Lex looked over Clark's shoulder, at the top of her head. "I promise, Victoria. I didn't kill any of the cows in Smallville."

"No. He just almost did, but it was always an accident," Clark said, cheerfully, and dried her tears with Superbear's floppy ear. "Kay?"

"Assident? Promise?" She rubbed her arm over her eyes. "Long as you didn't hurt the cows."

"He didn't. You know, my parents have a farm, and we've got tons of cows, and chickens, and stuff. And I've got puppies… do you like puppies?"

She nodded. "I likes puppies. Never had none before, but they cute. I seen pictures."

Lex pointed ahead. "There's the crosswalk, and there's the store."

"Well, our house is like a zoo. There's kittens, and puppies, and mice, and probably other stuff running around. Baldy doesn't say so, but I know he likes it," Clark said, as he squeezed Victoria's waist gently and moved with his lover over the crosswalk. As soon as it turned green they moved across, being herded with the other hundred people crossing the street, and after nearly stumbling and regarding a young buck with a cell phone with a glare, followed Lex toward the store.

Lex held the door open. As soon as he did, the smell of spice and incense hit them, and he breathed it in deeply, smiling. They always had a habit of tossing other things in the censors time to time, and he sauntered in easily. "Anise, still loading the censors with sage and cannabis, I see."

"Lex!!" The willowy-slender salesgirl whirled from the lean at the register and ran over to him. "It's been forever since we've seen you around here!!" She threw herself at him, giving him their customary kiss in greeting, then turned around and slithered against his chest as she observed the other two with him. "Awww... don't tell me it's true," she pouted. "You went and got yourself hitched?"

Lex took her hand off his crotch and used it to spin her a step away from him with a grin. "It's all true. I'm off the market, taken and happily so, and you're looking at him," he answered, anticipating the next question.

Anise gave Clark a heavy once-over. "Not bad, Lexie. Not bad."

Victoria leaned over and sneezed in Clark's ear. "I don't like her. She's weird."

"I don't like her either. She's touching my man," Clark whispered, as he tried violently not to glare at the little bitch who had draped herself all over his lover like watery silk, all limbs and breasts and hair up to there, and clenched his jaw as he forced a smile. What the fuck am I, a package of lean meat?

Anise leaned over and ran a finger up Clark's chest and over his lips. "Care to share, handsome? I'm always up for...adventure."

Lex grabbed the saleswoman's hand, and pulled it back. "No. No sharing. Not of him or me. Hands off," he said softly. "Of both of us."

"Awww," she pouted again. "If I'd known last time was going to be the *last* time, I wouldn't have let you walk away after just four rounds," she said, sliding her body over Lex's again, and then smiled.

Clark's nostrils flared, and trying not to sound too much like the country hick he was, set Victoria down and took her hand. "We're looking for the girls section. Point us in the right direction, then stay away."

Lex was gritting his teeth, but before he could tell her to shut up, Anise laughed.

"Little... section?" She was cracking up. "It doesn't work that way, sunshine. You tell me what you're looking for, and I bring it out of the back."

"Anise... enough," Lex said warningly. "You don't want to piss me off."

"You're just so precious when you're playing hard to get, Lex." She patted his cheek, and then batted his eyes. "You want to come and help me in the back?"

"No," Lex gritted. "I don't. Don't. Go. Further."

"Lex? Apparently this is not the right place we're looking for," Clark said, firmly, though where once his skin would have flushed in embarrassment, was now very, very white in anger as his jaw clenched and re-clenched. "Why don't we go? I'm sure we could spend our money in a better place."

Lex glared at Anise, even though his comment was addressed to Clark. "We're going to get the same reaction to whatever store we go to, Clark, and in a couple of them, you're going to get worse."

Clark seemed amused by that, because he glanced over at Lex, and grinned. "You're really shopping in the wrong places then, babe."

"No, I'm just shopping in places where I've fucked all the salespeople to get what I wanted," he clarified.

"BAD WORD!" Victoria yelled, and leaned over to bat at Lex's head. "Bad Baldy!"

"Yes, I'm sorry, Victoria, it was a bad word."

Anise burst out laughing again. "Oh my God you are whipped, Lex Luthor."

"And you are an exceedingly rude individual, when you know quite plainly that Lex is mine and yet, you're still challenging me." Clark answered, aware that his hackles were up but not. Caring. "We're looking for some clothes for this young lady. Why don't you be a peach and do your job?"

"I am doing my job, sunshine. I'm just working on my... commission." Anise slid her hand up Lex's chest, and was surprised to feel it jerked away.

"I told you, don't do that again," Lex said. "And if you'll go away and leave me alone, I'll add in a hundred thousand dollars just for you."

You'll be lucky if my commission isn't a kick in that flat ass of yours, you scrawny slut. "Mmm. Victoria would be about a size six, don't you think?" he asked, loudly.

Anise snickered again. "Boy, you're really not used to the high end of life, are you? Doesn't matter what size she is, sunshine. We customize everything. So, you tell me what you want for the little darling, and I trot it out. We measure, we sew, we deliver, you pay. Got it now?"

Clark's teeth were grinding so hard, so loudly, he was sure that even Lex could hear it over the cursing going on in his head. Lex, let's go.

Lex just nodded. "Yeah, we've got it. Thanks." He reached out and picked Victoria up off Clark's shoulders and tucked her into the crook of his arms. "Let's go; we'll find what we need somewhere else."

Clark whole heartedly agreed. He opened the door for lover and child both, and without a backwards glance, steppe out onto the street. He was so angry that he was sure something was going to pop somewhere down in the bowels of his gut, but he stayed quiet, silent, ever so silent as they walked.

Victoria looked up at Lex as they stepped out onto the street. "Clark's mad."

Lex nodded. "Yes, he is. He has a right to be."

"Why was the lady touchin' you like that? I thought that was bad touching."

He sighed as he lifted her up. "You know how it's okay for boyfriends and girlfriends to touch like that? Well, she used to be my girlfriend, in a loose sense of the word, and she wanted to be my girlfriend again today, and she thought I was just teasing about Clark being my only one now."

Victoria nodded. "She's a bad lady. I like Clark better." She smiled over Lex's shoulder at him, and gave him a little wave.

Lex kissed the top of her head. "So do I, angel," he agreed softly. "So do I. And I hope he knows that."

 

-fin-

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